Page 118

Grimacing, I nodded.

Her mouth opened and closed, and she shook her head numbly. “No. No, that can’t be.”

“I was in denial, too,” I said quickly. “After all, I thought you were just a witch. Neither of us knew you were actually part Mage. I thought it was physically impossible for us to be Soulbound. Not to mention there hasn’t been a Soulbound connection among our people for a century. I…. I dismissed the notion as soon as I heard it.”

“Then why are you telling me now?” Her voice was getting stronger, and the accusation burning in her eyes made me ache.

“Because now that we know about your wolf, I think it might actually be true. Don’t you recall how we were able to speak in each other’s minds, when I met you by the portal?”

Cerise’s frown deepened, but she nodded.

“That connection between us has only gotten stronger since we met,” I said, leaning closer to her. I took a chance and reached for her hand, but she snatched it away, tucking it under the blanket instead.

“So you’re telling me,” she said, her eyes brimming with anger, “that what I feel for you—and what you feel for me—is nothing more than the result of some predestined love match? It’s not real at all?”

My heart sank, and I quickly shook my head. “No! What we feel for each other is real. Our souls are merely marked for one another.”

“Marked?”

“Yes. The Goddess Lunaria has chosen us. The Soulbound connection is a bond sanctioned by her.”

“But I don’t believe in your goddess!”

My brows lowered. “As a Wolven Mage, you should. Her power is very real. It’s the reason you have your wolf.”

Cerise gave a harsh laugh. “I’m sorry, but I find it hard to believe in a goddess who has prewritten everything and taken away your free will.”

I made a frustrated sound, irritation prickling along my skin. “You still have free will! You can still make your own choices!”

“Really,” she said, her voice full of doubt. “So, I can still choose not to be with you?”

My heart plummeted all the way down to my stomach. A knot of emotion lodged in my throat, and I found it difficult to swallow. In a strained voice, I said, “Yes. You can still choose that. If it’s what you want.”

Moisture shone in her eyes, and her throat bobbed. “Alaric, you say that what we feel is real, but how do I know that? How do I know that you asked me to stay here with you because you love me, or because your goddess wanted you to?”

My eyes burned, and my breaths became shallow. “I asked you to stay here with me because I wanted to. Because I cannot bear to be apart from you.”

“But is that due to your own feelings? Or because we are Soulbound?”

I could only gape at her, unsure of how to respond. The passion we shared, the heat and longing between us, felt like it was withering away with each passing second.

I would always yearn for her—until my heart beat its last. But right now, I was beginning to doubt whether she still wanted me.

We had only been intimate once. I had only gotten to explore her beautiful body one time. To worship her, to show my devotion to her… only once. And I was already losing her.

Cerise sat up straighter, still covering herself with the sheet. Her expression was full of pain, and a single tear streaked down her face. “Did you ask me to stay here because of some inexplicable urge you couldn’t control? Or because you, yourself, wanted to choose a life with me?”

Horror spread through my chest at the conviction in her words. She already knew the answer.

Because the Alaric she knew would never willfully choose to love a witch. He would never have wanted a life like that, a life with someone who would never be accepted by his people.

My vision blurred, and heat climbed up my throat. “I—I love you with my entire soul, Cerise,” I said thickly. “I never wanted to be Soulbound to you. Even before I believed it was real, I found myself falling for you. I loved you before I accepted the connection between us. Didn’t you?”

Her lower lip wobbled, and another tear skated down her cheek. “I don’t know,” she whispered.

Gods, how could this be happening? I’d fretted for hours over telling her about our connection, and I feared she would be angry I had hidden the truth.

But this—this was so much worse.