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“Yeah,” she says and shrugs. “Anyone who doesn’t want to go can just head to the lodge. We’re not that far.”
I hold her gaze. “No, we cannot separate the group, Charlee.”
Who does she think she is? She has training. She knows nature is dangerous and unpredictable. What game is she playing? And leaving her alone with Trevor? No fucking way. Has she met him? The guy has been ogling every woman he crossed paths with and is waiting for the perfect moment to pounce, and she’s gladly giving it to him.
“Fine,” she drawls. “So why don’t we all go, then? Those who don’t want to have fun can just stay dry on the shore.”
That fucking attitude. I clench my fists. “Fine. Let’s go.”
Emma looks at me, then at Charlee. Let her think whatever she wants. I’m done caring about it. Charlee talks a big game of wanting to stay professional, but then she pulls shit like this? I don’t know how to act or how to be around her, and it’s driving me crazy. Every second is a confrontation I don’t want to have. And I’m tired of fighting a fight I can’t win.
As we move through the lush forest, the trees grow sparse, revealing a large meadow with a crystal-blue stretch of water at its center, and just like the times I’ve come here before, I’m left breathless.
“Not gonna lie, I feel like if I go in this, I’m gonna come up ten years younger and have eternal beauty,” Emma says, blinking. She lays her windbreaker on the grass, then carefully sets the camera on top. “All right, I’m in.”
“Yesss!” Charlee cheers while unlacing her boots.
She’s not going to . . .
Charlee doesn’t even pause as she slides her leggings down her long, toned legs, uncovering a black sports thong and flashing her gorgeous ass in front of me. And I don’t waste time dwelling on it, because her top comes off next, leaving her in nothing but a bra and thong, her smooth, sculpted back just begging for me to run my fingers over it.
Emma follows, and I look away. Trevor, on the other hand, doesn’t miss a thing.
“You girls ready?” Trevor asks, a grin on his face.
They stand on the ledge, and on three, they all jump into the lake. Droplets of water splash everywhere, and for a moment, I’m spellbound by the smile on Charlee’s lips. Maybe Emma was right and the water is magic, because the woman who shrieks from the cold and laughs like a kid isn’t the same one who hardly says a word to me.
My heart sinks, my throat knots, my eyes sting. It’s too much.
I’m swept up and pulled down into the depths of the emotions that I’ve tried so hard to control since Charlee came back into my life. But what’s the point? If my body is screaming at me to release them, what’s the point of resisting?
So I stop.
And everything rushes in: my feelings for her when we wrote each other all those long letters; her attitude toward me over the last few days; the memories of that dreadful day I can’t bring myself to forget; her smell, her smile, the sound of her voice; the things I never thought I’d be lucky enough to discover one day.
Dampness collects at the corners of my eyes, and I turn away.
“You okay, Oliver?” Charlee calls from the water. “Give us a few. We’ll get out in a bit.”
It takes all I have in me to push the words out, and even then, they come out shaking. “Take your time. I think I’ll just head back to the lodge.”
Worry grows in her voice. “I thought you said no separating the group.”
“It’s okay. The lodge is thirty minutes this way, and the path’s wide and clear enough.” I point toward the trees ahead of us. “You’ll be fine, but keep your phone with you just in case.”
“Are you sure? Oliver!” Charlee yells.
But I’m already walking away, my long strides taking me as far as possible from the reminder of my biggest mistake.
Toronto, December 15, 2017
Hi Oli,
Are you okay?
I was surprised by how short your last letter was. I hope everything’s okay with you and your grandparents.
My date was A-W-F-U-L. I was right, by the way. He was 100% a douchebag. Full of himself. He didn’t even pay for the super fancy restaurant he picked. Most of the time, I’m fine paying for myself, but if you choose a place that costs my monthly rent, you better pick up the bill.
