Page 89

“I wanted to help Eliza,” I say. If Grace can’t see my worth, I’ll just show it to her.

“I did not assign her this job.”

“I wouldn’t mind handing out water cups,” Eliza says. Behind her, some people watch, their stares boring into me, while others scroll through their phones, staying out of this scene playing out in the waiting room. “Emilyn’s doing a great job transporting the patients.”

Grace must be tuning out Eliza because she’s glowering at me.

“Get back to work,” Grace says, hitching a thumb at the waiting room, the only place she feels I belong.

I almost want to speak up like I did to Don McIntosh the other day. But I only grit my teeth and stitch my mouth shut. She stares at me hard enough that I walk to the middle of the waiting room, asking a man if he wants water. He says yes like he’s pretending he didn’t just witness a showdown between a volunteer and a nurse.

“You okay?” Eliza says, catching up to me as I head into the mini kitchen.

“Pretty crappy, actually,” I reply.

“What’s her problem?”

“She’ll probably never say. You should get back to work.”

“Do you need help with anything?”

I almost tell her it’s okay, I don’t want to get her in trouble. Then I have a flash to all my days volunteering here, each hour handing out water cups if anyone said yes, stuck with a job assigned to me by someone who can’t remember my name.

“I’m good,” I tell Eliza.

I fill up two water cups, restraining myself from crumbling the second one.

Grace steps into the waiting room just as Eliza and I step out. The timing could not be more perfect. Eliza gives the man the water cup as requested. Grace is about to snap at me again, but I speak first.

“I quit,” I say, handing her the water cup.

She winces. “I’m not assigning you another task.”

“No, I quit.” I move my hand forward enough that she has to take the cup. “I’m not volunteering here anymore.”

No matter what I did, I couldn’t satisfy Grace. I couldn’t even satisfy myself. The times I did something right I just felt relieved I survived. Nothing here is worth it, so why stay somewhere that doesn’t see my worth?

“Excuse me?” She clutches the water cup so tightly that the rim narrows into an oval, the water rising to the top.

“I’d rather not be stuck in a place where the head nurse can’t remember my name after four weeks.”

I whip around and march out. Eliza catches up and mouths, You tell her!

“Ellen?” Grace calls. “Ellen!”

I yank the door open and step out.

“Would anyone like a cup of water?” Grace asks in a polite tone that’s so obviously fake it hurts my ears.

There’s only silence when the door slams shut.

Chapter Thirty-Four

Maybe it’s the artistic atmosphere of Blossoms, but smelling watercolors and coffee together, the aroma is oddly satisfying.

People clack away on laptops, paint watercolor across paper, sketch illustrations in sketchbooks, and hum notes as they read music sheets. The place is filled with chatter, children slurping Blossom Blasts, and people my age eating strawberry scones and cherry croissants. I love it here.

My mom doesn’t come home until later, so I’m enjoying my free time, ignoring that I need to withhold another secret—that I quit WCH.