Page 19
He studied me for a long moment, his voice surprisingly soft when it came.
“You look for the impossible, in your books, in your love stories, so you never have to see what’s right in front of you.”
Right in front of you.
More accurately, who was right in front of me.
I frowned. “You mean—”
“The answer is for you alone.” His grin was lazy, but his eyes weren’t. “And one you’ve known all along.”
I swallowed. “Why didn’t you tell me that before?”
Riven’s smile deepened, wicked and knowing. “You hadn’t opened yourself up or prepared to hear it. Fear held you back. Still does.”
The truth slammed into me like the front end of the locomotive we were sitting in.
“You said you touched yourself, thinking of me?”
A slow, devastating smile. But no response.
Impossibly, with Riven sitting next to me, I ignored him long enough to consider the possibility.
If I were being honest, truly honest, with myself … I had considered the possibility before. But shoved it aside for the very reason Riven mentioned. That and the thought of screwing up what we already had.
“If you’re a part of him,” I mused, possibilities racing through my mind.
“Part of him?”
He laughed. Why did that make him laugh? I wanted to go. I needed to go back to see him. Talk to him.
As if that was all it took, wishing it to be true, the smell of rain and damp steel was replaced by a more familiar one. I blinked. Once. Twice. Re-focusing on the book in my lap, the shelves around me and my phone ringing.
Picking it up, assuming it was Charlee, I was surprised to hear Nolan’s voice.
“Good thing. You had about five minutes before I came down there and broke in.”
He was clearly shaken.
“Where are you?”
“Boots and Brews. The guy started his first set. You told Mazzie you were coming early to meet him but weren’t responding to either of our texts. Lena, what’s going on with you?”
Shit. Shit. Shit.
“Nothing,” I said. “Tell Mazzie I’ll be there in a half hour and will catch him between sets.”
Silence.
Riven’s words still rung in my ear, the implications of my last two visits with Rowan and Riven blasting though any rational thoughts. Nolan and I needed to talk. No, I needed to think this through first.
“Are you there?”
“Yeah,” he said, his voice flatter than usual. “I wish you were. I’ll see you later.”
With that, he hung up.
Nolan had never, ever hung up on me before.
