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“You said once that it feels as if you’ve known me since birth. Though your daily rides were most unusual, it took me some time to sort out. After all, you told me of that first visit, why not the subsequent ones.”

“Allie!” He loved her, but Aidan also wanted to shake her at the moment. “Who else knows?”

She mimicked his earlier stance, crossing her arms in front of her. “You mean to ask, ‘Does Graeme know?’” Allie pretended to consider the question. “Is it not odd that you once helped me overcome my sister’s reluctance to accept Reid, and I am now doing the very same for you?”

Aidan’s heart threatened to explode. “This is not simply a disagreement between siblings. Gillian was the only barrier that stood between you and Reid. In this situation, Graeme has every reason to be upset. My attachment to her could jeopardize everything. And you believe just because her marriage is no longer—”

“I’ve never seen you this way,” she said, reaching out to touch his arm. The sympathy in her eyes sliced through him. “The people you love are happy. Do you not believe you also deserve—”

“It does not matter what I deserve. Clarissa and I . . . we cannot be.”

“But once her father agrees to remove Caxton—”

“It will be too late. Besides which, Theffield could easily go back on his word.” Hadn’t he thought the situation through each and every night? Aidan pulled his arm away and shook his head. “This is no time to play matchmaker, Allie. It is simply not possible—”

“Then why do you see her each day?”

“It does not matter why,” he lashed out. “She cannot wait for the abbess any longer. If her father finds her—”

“Aidan . . .”

It was the gentle tone that kept him pinned to the spot.

“You love her.”

Dear God, he did. He had never stopped loving her. And that was why he had to ensure she left for Dunburg. Now. “My feelings matter not.”

“There must be a way for you to be together.”

“I must go.”

When Allie smiled once again, he realized she had misunderstood.

“I must go tell her to leave tonight. I will escort her to the abbey,” he thought aloud.

Allie was incredulous. “Aidan, you cannot—”

“You don’t understand the political situation,” he said. “You and Clarissa were raised in much the same way. Sheltered, unaware of—”

“Do not insult me.”

And now she was furious with him. But how else could he explain to her what would happen if he were caught with Clarissa? Each time he saw her, each time he helped her against Theffield’s wishes, he further jeopardized the future of the Day of Truce. These past days with her . . . they had been the best of Aidan’s life, but they both knew their time was limited.

“I’m sorry,” he said, and meant it. “Tell Graeme everything,” he added, aware his brother would not be pleased. But it no longer mattered. By the time he came back, Clarissa would be safely installed at Dunburg Abbey.

And if the nuns do not agree to take her?

They would. The jewels she brought them would ensure it. The question was not if they would take her, but how Aidan could bear to leave her there, never to see her again.

Chapter 11

By the time they reached Sutworth, all was quiet. None but the guards stirred at this late hour, and though he and Lawrence had been admitted entry easily enough, they’d been provided with an escort to the keep. It was no less than he would expect. In fact, Aidan silently praised their caution, for even though the men here knew him, it was a most unusual hour for a social visit.

Having handed off their mounts to a sleepy stablehand, the small party walked toward the keep’s entrance, their steps echoing loudly in the quiet courtyard. Dry dirt and small rocks crunched beneath their feet, testament to the unusually long stretch of days without rain.

Lawrence glanced at him as if to ask, yet again, what they were doing here. It had not taken Aidan long to realize it would be wise to have at least one man by his side. Already a distance from Highgate End, he’d quickly dismissed the idea of returning for his brother. The chief could not be seen here, even if he agreed to come.

A borderer his entire life, his friend had no love for the English. While Aidan’s father had been a tolerant man, the same could not be said for the chief of Clan Karyn. As Lawrence had said often enough, “If the bastards had not routed out my family from their ancestral home, I may have been of a different opinion.”