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I scowl, frustration and fear warring in my chest. “What do you want from me, Katerina? What do you want me to say?”

“The truth!” She throws her hands up, her eyes flashing. “I want the full truth, Nico. About how you feel, about what you want. About what I am to you.”

I stare at her, my heart pounding against my ribs. The truth. She wants the truth.

“What things, Nico? What do you feel for me?” she presses.

I look away, my jaw clenching. I’m not good at this, at putting my emotions into words. It feels too raw, too vulnerable, like exposing the soft underbelly of my soul.

But she deserves my soul. Even if it flays me open and changes everything between us.

“I love you,” I say, my voice hoarse, heart pounding. “I love you so much it fucking hurts, Katerina. The thought of losing you, of anything happening to you, it kills me. It fucking destroys me.”

Her eyes widen with shock. I watch as she processes my words, as the reality of what I’m saying sinks in.

She swallows heavily, her throat working. “Nico,” she says weakly.

“I know,” I cut her off, not wanting to hear her pity. “I know you probably don’t feel the same way and that’s okay. I’ve done really shitty things and loving me isn’t easy. But you asked for the truth and I’m giving it to you⁠—”

“Nico, stop.” She crosses the room to me, her hands coming up to frame my face. Her touch is soft, soothing the ragged edges of my soul. “I—I don’t know how I feel,” she says slowly. “This, between us…it’s complicated, especially now that I’m pregnant.” Her face pinkens a little. “I have to reconcile the man I know you can be with the things you’ve done. The things you’re still doing.”

This fucking sucks to hear, but I don’t pull away. I owe her this honesty, this unflinching assessment of who and what I am.

“But that doesn’t mean I don’t care for you,” she continues, her thumb brushing over my cheekbone. “That doesn’t mean there isn’t…something here. I just—I need time, Nico. Time to sort through it all, to figure out what it means.”

I nod, leaning into her touch despite myself. “I understand,” I murmur, my eyes closing. “I’m not asking for anything, Katerina. I just needed you to know why I didn’t tell you about the danger sooner.”

She’s quiet for a moment, her breath warm against my lips. “Were you trying to protect me, Nico? Or were you protecting yourself from the conversation?”

I nearly stumble backward at her question. I open my eyes, meeting her gaze head-on.

“Both,” I admit. “I wanted to keep you safe and shield you from the threat. But I was also scared of losing you too. But yeah, a lot of it was to keep you safe.”

Katerina scowls at me, her eyes flashing with annoyance. “You need to stop doing that,” she snaps, crossing her arms over her chest. “Stop trying to protect me by keeping me in the dark. I’m not some fragile flower, Nico. I can handle myself.”

I nearly snort in disbelief. I know she’s strong, but the thought of her in danger, of any harm coming to her is like a red haze descending over my vision.

“I know you can,” I tell her. “But that doesn’t mean I won’t do everything in my power to keep you safe.”

Katerina rolls her eyes. “I don’t need your protection, Nico.”

My brow furrows as I stare at her in disbelief. “Katerina,” I say slowly, as if explaining to a child. “You’re not part of this world. You don’t know the first thing about protecting yourself from the kinds of threats we’re facing.”

She jerks back as if I’ve slapped her, hurt and anger warring in her eyes. “How dare you,” she hisses, her hands balling into fists at her sides. “How dare you dismiss me like that, like I’m some naive little girl playing at being tough.”

I sigh, rubbing a hand over my face. “That’s not what I meant,” I say wearily, even though it kind of is. “I know what I’m doing, Katerina. This is my world, my life. And I’m telling you, you’re not ready for it.”

“And you think you are?” she demands, her voice rising. “You think just because you’re some big, bad mafia underboss, you’ve got it all figured out? That you can just handle everything on your own, no matter the cost?”

“Yes,” I snap, my own temper flaring. “That’s exactly what I think. Because that’s my job, Katerina. That’s what I was trained for, what I was born for. Protecting what’s mine, no matter the price. Just like it’s your cousin’s job too.”

She stares at me for a long moment, her chest heaving, her eyes bright. “And what about what I want?” she asks finally. “What about what I need?”

I close my eyes, a dull ache spreading through my chest. “What you need,” I say quietly, “is to stay alive. To stay safe. And I’m going to make sure that happens, whether you like it or not.”

There’s a beat of silence, a moment that stretches like an eternity. Then, without another word, she turns on her heel and walks out, slamming the door shut behind her.

Later that afternoon, I find myself locked in my study, pouring over maps and intel reports, trying to piece together a plan to neutralize Russo’s network. It’s a daunting task, a tangled web of alliances and enmities that span half the country.