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“Goddammit!” Not for the first time, I was glad I spent my nights in a club where the music drowned out my self-directed anger. Okay, I was angry at Carl, but it was my fault I always gave in to his demands. I was a fucking doormat.

But hey, at least he wanted my help, needed me in some capacity. He wanted me around. And as fucked up as it was, I wasn’t ready to let that go.

Chapter sixteen

Tristan

When Nate and Anson told me they didn’t have any plans for lunch, I instantly thought of Cameron. I needed to know what went down between my bestie and Sam last night. Not that he’d be super forthcoming with all the guys there, but I suspected he’d appreciate the company. Guy got all up in his head sometimes. Perils of being a writer, I supposed.

I was smirking when I rang the bell at Cameron’s front door, the smell of the best pizza in town wafting from the boxes Ethan was carrying. I’d invited everyone, but when Cameron opened the door and just stared at us, I momentarily wondered if he didn’t appreciate the surprise. But then Nate, jumping in with both feet as always, brushed past Cameron as soon as the door opened with a loud “hello”—on his way to the fridge to keep the beers he’d brought chilled, I suspected—and my bestie finally noticed the food. When his stomach growled, I knew he was grateful we’d stopped by. I doubted he’d even thought to eat.

Sam really needed to take over Daddy duties full-time, or Cameron would never eat enough. I could only do so much.

After teasing and grilling my BFF about last night and finding out he’d had an incredible one, we all sat down to eat. I dropped to the floor and scooted up to the coffee table next to Cameron, who was wincing as he sat, so I knew my dude had gotten his ass beaten just as he liked. Good for him.

We had very few secrets between us—because camboy and gay romance writer—and I was happy as hell for him. I really hoped things worked out for him and Sam.

As the guys shot the shit and the conversation meandered, I let my mind do the same. On a daily basis, I found myself wondering what Henry was up to. Okay, multiple times a day. And despite hosting a number of live streams on Daddy’s Boy since our hookup at the beginning of the month—again, hookup felt wrong to even think—MrFox43 had never shown up. So aside from the one Daddies and Subs Club held since our night together, I had no way to keep tabs on him. Had he given up on me and Substar altogether? Or was he so hurt by my departure the morning after our life-altering sex that he couldn’t enjoy watching me as I got off for the camera?

I suspected it was the latter. Given his confessions that night, I doubted he’d let his feelings go so easily.

And didn’t that make me the biggest piece of shit to ever walk the earth?

A question Cameron directed to Anson brought me back to reality. “So how did you two fare last night?”

Nate answered him when Anson blushed and kept quiet. “Anson could hardly make it through the final demonstration. You know, the one you missed.”

“Shut up, Nate,” Anson sniped at Nate’s teasing.

I couldn’t resist finding out how Henry’s demonstration went, regardless of how it might hurt. And given Anson’s too astute observation last night, I had to make sure no one suspected I was reeling over the man. So I upped the playfulness to a thousand.“Ooo—tell us what happened!”

Nate began relaying the tale to his captive audience, including my begrudging self. But when he said, “. . . you could tell Carter was super into it. Henry, not so much, I think,” my heart tripped over itself. What had happened with Henry?

Nate came off like a himbo, but I think he was more observant than anyone gave him credit for.

Ethan cut in. “Why do you say that?”

Nate shrugged. “Just a hunch. He put on a good show, but still. He’s such a gentle dude, maybe even a Daddy—I don’t think he’s into the really intense stuff. I got the sense he was just giving Carter what he needed, not that he was getting off on it himself.”

Cameron was nodding. “That tracks. He’s looking for a boy to spoil, from what I can tell.”

As I struggled not to shift in my seat, I cleared my throat. “What makes you say that?”

My bestie simply repeated Nate’s words. “Just a hunch.”

They weren’t wrong. Henry was a gentle soul, and I suspected inflicting pain on Carter wasn’t good for him. I thought he’d probably be into spanking me enough to make me fly, but I doubted he’d want to go any further than that. Which was perfectly fine with me—I didn’t like pain the way my Cammy did.

Shit, I needed to stop that line of thinking right now. That wasn’t gonna happen. We had one amazing night together, but it was over. It had to be.

I tuned back in to hear my bestie say, “But regardless, I don’t think he’ll have any trouble finding that special boy, if he wants one. That man is the definition of a silver fox. Seriously—google ‘silver fox’ and see if his picture doesn’t come up.”

He let out a shiver as my heart panged with sadness at the ring of truth in his words.

Cameron continued. “Plus, I hear the man is . . . um, well-endowed.”

I ducked my head as my eyes shot wide, hoping no one saw my reaction as Nate jumped in. “I can confirm that. His leather pants were tight last night, and I could see everything from where I was sitting. He may not have gotten off on the pain, but he was turned on by something—I’m guessing Carter’s submission. And fuck, that dude’s dick is porn-star-award-worthy.”

Again, they weren’t wrong.