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“The slide says ‘no killing,’ not ‘no fighting.’” Julius argued. “I already wrote it down.”
“There will be no violence of any kind.”
The Light Phases all squinted at her, like she was shouting nonsense at the sky. Apparently, a night without bloodshed seemed improbable to them. Considering the cultural limitations of her audience, Randa lowered her expectations.
“Just… don’t kill anyone.” She clicked the spacebar again, refusing to be dragged into their madness. “Rule two: Do not kidnap anyone. Even if you think she’s pretty. Even if you think she’s your Match. Even if you think it’s a really, really good idea in that moment. No. You can’t abduct a prospective bride.”
“What if my prospective bride wants to be abducted?” Daven pressed.
“Then she’s probably a Fire Phase and you can do better.” Randa clicked the spacebar. “Rule three: You must pretend to be human. Do not tell anyone you’re Elementals.”
“What if a girl asks me if I’m an Elemental? She might be my Match. I can’t lie to my Match.”
“You’re never going to get a Match, if you keep interrupting Randa with dumb questions.” Kahn snapped at Daven. “She’s trying to help us. Keep quiet.”
Randa was shocked that he’d weighed in on her behalf. “Thank you.”
Kahn glanced at her for half a second and then quickly looked away again. “You’re welcome.” Clearing his throat, he awkwardly shifted on the couch.
Randa kept staring at him. Was he blushing?
“What did you say about the kidnapping part?” Julius asked in confusion. “That’s not something we should do, right?”
Randa jolted. “Right. All of these are ‘don’ts,’ remember?” Quickly refocusing, she gave Julius an encouraging nod. “Humans don’t like to be abducted on their nights’ out.”
Daven opened his mouth to offer an opinion.
“No.” Kahn warned him flatly.
Daven closed his mouth again.
“I’m never going to remember all these damn ‘don’ts.’” Mannus flopped his head back with a defeated groan. “The rules are too confusing.”
“No telling people we’re Phases. No abducting Matches. No fighting with swords.” Julius recited, reading his notepad. “You should write them down, like me.”
Randa believed in positive reinforcement for her students. “Great effort, Julius. I’m very impressed with your dedication.”
Julius preened.
Kahn shot a feral scowl in his direction.
“So what are we allowed to do at this bar?” Rye complained, restlessly flipping his knife.
“I’m glad you asked.” Randa advanced to the next slide, which featured a yellow happy face, red kissy lips, and a silhouette of a couple holding hands. The program was old, by human technology standards, but it still allowed her to add clipart graphics to the presentation. She might have gone overboard.
Kahn’s expression seemed to soften, as he looked from Randa to the colorful screen.
“Here are some ‘do’s’ for you to remember tonight.” Randa pointed to bullet-point number one. “Do be approachable. Laugh at women’s jokes. Be nice. Smile.” She sent Kahn a pointed look. “Some of you will probably need to practice that, since it will be a totally new expression for you.”
His lips stretched into a picture-perfect grin. “I’ll practice with you.”
Holy moly.
The smile totally transformed his face. Even when Randa told herself it was just a cuddly façade over concrete, she couldn’t look away. She’d truly never seen a more attractive man in her whole life.
This was awful!
When Kahn wasn’t being a scowling dumbass, he made her insides all warm and tingly. It was some kind of magic that she couldn’t explain, but --wow!-- did she feel it. How did he do that? Did it work on everyone? If it did, human women would be swarming over him like locusts.
