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“I can’t just stand here,” I argue, voice cracking with emotion. “She’s down there, Soren. She’s under the fucking ground, and she’s alone with no water, no food, no—”
“I know!” He roars, features twisting in anguish. He stalks across the few feet separating us and reaches out, fisting the front of my shirt with hands shaking with fear.
“You think I’m not terrified?” he demands. “You think I’m not cycling through the same shit in my head right now? Godsdamnit, Caelan! If you keep digging, you’ll fuck with the integrity, and you’ll bring the whole fucking thing down on top of her. If she’s anywhere near it, she’ll be crushed.”
My hands curl into fists at my sides, and I glance toward the pile of rubble, then back to Soren, debating his words. Now that he’s said it, it seems obvious, and the horror of what I may have just done starts to creep in.
“You’ll kill our Omega,” he breathes, and the words slam into my chest, ripping something apart. The mere idea of hurting Idril causes something inside of me to recoil in terror. I reach frantically for our Bond, suddenly terrified that I’ve done exactly what Soren’s describing. It takes longer than usual to latch onto it, but when I do, I sag with relief.
“She’s alive,” he confirms, placing a comforting hand on my shoulder. “Frustrated, but I don’t think she’s hurt.”
“Why is it so fucking hard to feel her since she went down there?”
He shakes his head, scrubbing a tired palm down his face.
“I don’t know. But I do know that if she were in real danger, we would know, even with the Bond being muted the way it is.”
“There has to be an explanation. If I could just get to her…” I trail off, shaking my head in frustration.
“I want to get to her just as bad as you do,” Soren replies. “It took everything in me not to rip into those rocks and help you. But I’ve seen a cave-in before. We lost two Betas and an Alpha when the floods came a few years ago. The Alpha’s Packmates found the cave and went in just like you were doing and brought the entire structure down on top of them. I was there when they felt the Bond snap.”
The silence that follows speaks volumes. He swallows thickly, like he’s trying to push back his emotions.
“It was horrific, Caelan. I’ll never forget the sounds they made. The way they suddenly went still. I never want to see something like that again.”
“I’m sorry,” I reply, at a total loss for words. How do you even respond to something like that? I can’t fucking imagine witnessing it, let alone going through it myself.
Soren shakes his head, long blonde hair shifting around his shoulders. “Don’t be. It was terrible but… it was a long time ago.” He turns, placing both hands on my shoulders and looking me straight in the eye. “I’m only telling you because I want you to know… that’s how I know she’s okay. If she were hurt—truly hurt—we’d feel it. I know we would. We have two Bonds with her, Caelan. Two. And I can’t imagine that Fate would give her these Bonds—including one we know nothing about that is somehow so much stronger than the other—just to lead her to a cave to die.”
His words make sense, and I’m surprised by how much better I feel after hearing them. Once again, I’m struck by how grateful I am for Soren. Without him, I would have felt a thousand times more alone since waking up in the clinic. It’s not easy trying to process the loss of my Pack—let alone their betrayal—and Soren has fit into my life seamlessly, like he was always meant to be here.
A rustling comes from my right, and I glance over to find Shade padding toward us. He narrows his eyes at me in a way that’s becoming far too familiar, then lets out a sigh that’s even more unnatural than normal. When he gets close enough, I extend my hand like I used to when we had horses. I don’t even know why I do it. Habit, I guess.
He doesn’t take in my scent, choosing instead to butt his head against my hand in greeting before slinking between Soren and me. Thinking he’s dismissed me, I’m shocked when I feel something solid and warm pressing against my thigh, and glance down to find Shade rubbing against me like a house cat would rub against the legs of its human.
I turn wide-eyed toward Soren, who’s sporting a shit-eating grin. That grin turns into laughter when Shade opens his mouth and runs his raspy tongue from my knuckles all the way up my forearm.
Then, like he hadn’t just freaking kitty-comforted me, he turns around, stalks back toward the cavern, spins in place twice, and lowers himself to the ground. He yawns, showing off a mouthful of razor-sharp teeth, before laying his huge head on his paws.
“What the fuck just happened?” I mutter in disbelief.
“Haven’t you ever had a cat? That’s what they do when their people are sad,” Soren responds, clearly biting the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing.
“Of course I’ve had cats,” I answer flatly. “Just not ones that weigh as much as I do.”
I glance back at the feline, lounging in a patch of sun. His eyes are half-closed, his tail twitching back and forth like a metronome, but I’d bet my last dollar he’s more alert than either of us.
Following Shade’s lead, Soren and I both take a seat not far from Shade, leaning our backs against the now-destroyed cave. I don’t know how long we sit there, two pathetic Alphas waiting for their Mate, but it’s long enough for the sun to reach its zenith and begin its descent.
I wonder if this is what life will be like from now on—coming out here every day, where we’re closest to our Omega, waiting and praying she returns safely.
It’s only because it’s so damn quiet and I’m so attuned to the sounds around me that I clock the instant Shade’s tail stops twitching. A second later, Soren cocks his head to the side, which I know now after seeing it enough times means he’s speaking to one of his Pack.
And just like I always do when I’m around, and it happens, I marvel at the wolven’s ability to mind-link. It’d be so fucking nice to be able to speak to other Bastards without relying on comms units when we’re away from each other.
A few minutes pass before Soren stands and reaches out a hand to help me up. I take it and climb to my feet, searching the forest and wondering what the hell's going on.
“Someone’s coming,” Soren murmurs, answering my unspoken question. I tap into my enhanced hearing and easily pick up the sounds of movement. Whoever it is isn’t bothering to hide their approach, crashing through the forest loud enough that I almost wonder if they’re trying to announce their presence.