Page 47

“So . . . what’d you think?” You’re beautiful.

I pushed off the counter and went to her. I placed my palms on the counter on either side of her legs. Her eyes widened as I leaned closer. The side of my rogue thumb brushed her bare skin close to her knee. I heard her breath hitch as my nose brushed her left ear.

“It’s not Johnny, but I guess the beat is kind of sexy.”

An involuntary shiver ran through her body and I bit back a grin. It’s been awhile since I’d flirted with a woman, but this was a game I was good at. The thing was, this time it wasn’t a game for me. Not with her.

I pulled back to see her eyes, examining her reaction. Her eyes were dilated, and I loved seeing them this close. All the different shades of blue all pieced together like a watercolor painting of the sky.

“See! There are some good songs made this decade.”

Her breath was uneven and her eyes dropped to my mouth before bouncing back up to meet my eyes. I ran my tongue over my lower lip. Her eyes dropped again. I could see her heart racing at the base of her throat. With Sawyer’s history, I wanted her to be the one calling the shots and being in control. I wanted it to be her choice, because it always would be. As much as I wanted to claim her mouth and sink my hands in her thick waves of golden silk, I knew it was not the right time. The fact she hadn’t moved closer was a sign that she wasn’t ready yet.

“I think I like disagreeing with you,” she whispered while her eyes bounced between mine.

The amount of restraint I had by not wrapping her in my arms and showing her how beautiful she was, was unbearable.

“It’s time for you to head home, Pretty Girl, before it gets too late.”

Something unrecognizable passed across her eyes, and she nodded.

I hated the words more than I should, but I knew that if I didn’t create some distance between us, I’d do something that she may not be ready for. I’d rather cut off my own arm than do anything that made her feel unsafe. I backed away, helped her round up her dishes and bag, slid on my boots, and walked her to her car.

Sawyer

I didn’t have any firsthand experience with romantic relationships, which is embarrassing enough to admit, but I was certain I had almost been kissed. The thing that surprised me was the sensation deep in my core that felt disappointed when it didn’t happen. There wasn’t a doubt in my mind that kissing Soren would be mind-altering, but the part that felt as though I would never measure up plagued the back of my mind. I slipped off the counter and gathered my things. Ever the gentleman, Soren walked me to the car under the light of the moon.

I wanted to ask him. I wanted to know more than anything why he was going to kiss me and why he didn’t. His hand leaned against the roof of my Jeep as I stood by the door, feeling uncertain for the first time on how to say goodbye.

“Thank you for dinner.”

I smiled softly. My heart was full and happy regardless of the prior maybe-almost-kiss situation. He smiled and pulled me into a hug. His chin rested on my head, and a part of me never wanted to leave. He was the first man who had ever made me feel safe on this level, and I wanted to burrow into his warmth. I shifted closer, resting my face against his heart to hear the beat. Closing my eyes, I listened until he pulled back. His eyes darkened, and I had that sensation that I was going to be kissed.

He abruptly knocked on the roof of the Jeep twice and said, “Drive safe. Text me when you get home to let me know you made it safe.”

I spent half of the car ride home wondering why Soren hadn’t kissed me and the other half wondering why I hadn’t been brave enough to kiss him first.

Chapter

Thirty-Five

Soren

I watched Lane and Jonah go for a round in the ring. Lane was all talk, which thankfully he could back up most of the time, but Jonah fought as he lived. Jonah was like watching a panther. He was quiet, intense, and dodged hits with an unmatched fluidity while also intimidating his opponent with his intensity. I fought against him regularly, but often lost. He was a black belt in karate, trained in Krav Maga, and was a Veteran Marine. Both men were shirtless and sweating from exertion. I stood to the side, having completed a five-mile run on the treadmill. Unexpectedly, Jonah threw a right hook that connected with Lane’s face, and the timer on Jonah’s phone went off. I reached to silence it as they returned to their corners and toweled off their faces and chests.

“Man, you’ve been practicing without me?” Lane asked, working to catch his breath.

“You know he’s always practicing,” I stated, and we both knew it to be true. Lane had upped his gym time to help with the anxiety he’d been having lately, but Jonah was still a beast to fight against. He’d never said why he felt the need to push so hard, but if I had to guess, it was because of the hell he’d been through as a kid. My demons were playthings compared to the things he and Landry had been through. They fought tooth and nail for everything they had and were two of the best humans I knew.

We made our way to the water bottle station and refilled our bottles.

“Anybody in a rush tonight?” Lane asked.

Jonah met my eyes, and we both gave a negative response and headed for the table unsure of what Lane was about to say.

“I have an idea, and I want to run it by both of you,” Lane laid out.

“I’ve been thinking of ways to help the kids in Kennedy and other small towns similar to ours. Ever since I began coaching at the high school last year, I’ve been seeing up close how some of the families in town are living. I want to help but not make it seem like a handout, because the people that seriously need help won’t go for that. I ran some ideas by one of my baseball buddies that has a few organizations in inner city Detroit. Obviously, it’d have to be adapted to accommodate a rural town, but I was thinking of a resource center. There’d be tutoring, therapy, financial classes, and maybe we can partner with the gym for self-defense. Something that maybe people can volunteer at to give the impression they are giving back. Maybe a perk could be gift cards to the grocery store to help make ends meet, or therapy for kids having issues in school. Sure, there’s a school counselor, but it’s not enough,” He reasoned, rubbing the towel down his neck again. Lane was always searching for ways to give back, and I had partnered with him multiple times over the last eight years.