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“And how do you feel about it?” I ask.
“Like I really need a drink right now, and I’m pregnant, so I can’t get a drink, and it’s really messin’ with my head.”
Bree chuckles. “Duke’s gonna watch you like a hawk.”
Elena groans. “He already does. Last week, he told me I shouldn’t be letting a gelding crowd my space—like I haven’t been doing this since I was sixteen. Now that I’m pregnant, he’s going to go nuts.”
“Speaking of nuts.” I cut a burger in half. “Mason came by yesterday to talk, and I”—pause dramatically and look around the room—“kneed him in his nuts.”
The women clap appreciatively.
“I wish I’d done that to Duke when he was being a complete dick to me,” Elena muses.
“Describe it in great detail, Taya,” Joy prompts. “I’m still so pissed with the man.”
“He was just—there. On one knee. Holding the railing.” I stare at my wine. “He looked—” I stop.
“What?” Joy asks.
“He didn’t look like he thought he didn’t deserve it.” I groan out loud. “He just—took it. And then he asked if I felt better? I said marginally, and then I told him to get out and stay away from Clara, and he said ’okay’ and left.” I pause. “Once he could stand that is.”
“And then what?” Bree wants to know.
“And then nothing. He’s at the Ridgeline. He’s still here.” I down the remaining wine in my glass.
Aria rubs a hand over my arm. “He came back.”
“I know.”
“And he told you everything.” This is from Sarah.
“I know.”
“And he’s still here.” Bree thinks about it. “Like Kaz.”
I refill my glass with a red—I don’t know what it is anymore. After a couple of glasses, you’ll drink swill and not know. “I know all of that. I can’t do anything with any of it yet.”
“You don’t have to.” Joy winks at me. “That’s what tonight is for.”
The wine does its work.
By nine o’clock, the food is gone.
Joy cuts the chocolate cake, which we all decided must be eaten in its entirety by us. I help her plate each slice and send it around the table.
We move into the living room at some point.
Aria produces a third bottle of red, and the music gets louder without anyone deciding to make it louder.
Elena is beside me on the couch, her feet tucked under her. She’s drinking tea. She doesn’t even like tea, but she wants to drink something, and she can’t drink alcohol or caffeine. She tastes the tea and whines. “These nine months are gonna be long.”
“It’s going to go so fast it’ll make your head spin, and you know it.” I put my hand on hers. “Congratulations…again.”
She nods and then gives me a measured look. “You’re going to be okay. I’m not trying to comfort you—this is just a fact that I arrived at when Duke and I were a total shitshow.”
“How did it become okay?”
“It’s organic.” She lifts a shoulder and lets it drop. “Like working a horse that doesn’t trust you, yet. You don’t force it—you show up, you stay consistent, and one day it just…gives a little. Then a little more.”