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But he grabbed her waist and pulled her onto his lap.

“Fine!” my mom screamed. “I’m a little picky. Stop tickling me!”

My dad stopped and kissed her cheek. But he kept his arm around her so she couldn’t move. “How was your day today?” my dad asked her.

She sighed. “Not great. I have this demonic student. And now he’s doing more than just writing ridiculous essays. You know that bumper sticker you got me from the beach? The one that says: A woman’s place is on the water?”

“Yeah, I remember,” my dad said.

“He covered up the bottom with a piece of paper that said in the kitchen.”

RJ laughed. “So it says a woman’s place is in the kitchen? Solid prank.”

“No, not a solid prank. It’s vandalism!”

“Kind of a solid prank,” my dad agreed. He and RJ bumped fists.

I laughed too. “Was this the same kid that wrote the essay about Harry Potter?”

“Yes. He’s the worst kid I’ve ever had to teach. He’s making my whole semester miserable.”

“He probably just wants your attention,” I said. “Maybe he has a crush on you.”

My dad frowned. “Well I don’t like that.”

“He doesn’t have a crush on me,” my mom said. “I’m Mrs. Hunter. He knows I’m married. Everyone knows I’m married.” She lifted her left hand to show off her rings. “He’s just a bad kid.”

“Just because you’re married doesn’t mean he doesn’t have a crush,” I said. “Maybe he has a thing for married women.”

“A thing?” my mom asked.

“Yeah. Like a kink,” I said.

“What on earth do you know about kinks?”

I shrugged.

“Robert,” she said and hit my dad’s chest so he’d chime in.

“We’re a pranks household, kids. Not a...kinks household? Sorry, babe, I don’t know what you want me to say here.”

My mom laughed. “Not that.”

“I tried my best.” He kissed her cheek. “Come on, kids. Let’s eat our gross uncooked tomatoes.”

My mom rolled her eyes as she slid off his lap. “Not you too.”

“I’m allowed one thing I don’t love when these little goblins have hundreds.”

“Fine, no more uncooked tomatoes.”

“Score,” RJ said. “Now I want to hear more about this demonic student. What other pranks has he pulled? I need to find something good to do to Uncle James.”

“He drew a penis on my chalkboard too,” my mom said. “The little punk.”

I laughed.

“Oh, I love that,” RJ said. “Uncle James would freak if he walked into his class and there were penises all over his board.”