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I thought about Adonis’ mother leaving when he was little. And how he’d fallen for my mom. He clearly had mommy issues. I’d just gotten caught in the crosshairs of his own Greek tragedy.

But the more important thing I’d found out was that Adonis was gored by a wild boar. That’s how he’d died in the myths. And there was something very satisfying about that image.

I hugged my knees tighter to my chest.

My phone buzzed again. I glanced at my screen to see Adonis calling. I hit the end call button.

That was the thing that made this especially hard. That he didn’t seem to want to go away.

Mr. Halifax went poof in the night.

Adonis wouldn’t let me breathe.

I lay back in the sand and squinted at the clouds in the sky. It was easy to picture a wild boar in the clouds. I didn’t want Adonis back. He’d felt like everything to me. And thinking back on that was a scary thought.

He’d railroaded my life. He’d whispered sinful things in my ear, making promises he never meant to keep. It was like he’d poured gasoline all over my life and gotten me to willingly light the match. And oh what a blaze of flames my life had lit up in.

Adonis wasn’t good for me.

Maybe if we’d met under different circumstances, things could have been different. But I knew that wasn’t true. He never would have looked my way if I didn’t look like my mom. And now that he knew how easily I could be manipulated, I’d never be able to trust him again.

I stared at the notification that had just appeared on my screen, signaling that I had a new voicemail. He’d left me bunches. I’d only listened to the first one.

He’d apologized. He’d said he loved me. He’d sounded sincere.

But what did I know? I’d believed him the whole freaking time. He’d made me not trust myself. And I think that was the hardest part. Not being able to trust my own judgment.

A few seagulls flew by, calling. I reached up and touched the dove on my necklace. I knew I needed to give this back. But giving it back meant seeing Adonis. And I wasn’t ready to do that yet. But I also didn’t want to take it off because it reminded me of him and I was sick in the head.

I sighed. Me being here didn’t even feel real. It was hard to comprehend how I’d made such terrible decisions. But apparently that’s what I did. I focused all my attention on something, risking everything in the process. My feelings for him had been real. And I couldn’t just will them away that easily. It was my curse. I loved hard and fast. And that made the fallout hurt even worse.

I closed my eyes. I’d never make that mistake again.

***

“Sophie!” someone yelled. “Sophie, are you out here?!”

I yawned and slowly sat up. I must have fallen asleep. “Over here,” I said, but my voice was all hoarse. I cleared my throat. “Over here!” I yelled.

“Guys, she’s over here!” Scarlett yelled. A few seconds later, she barreled into my side. “God I’ve missed you.”

I hugged her back. “I’ve missed you too.” She’d called me almost as much as I’d called the admissions office over the past week. She’d wanted to come sooner, but I insisted she didn’t. I insisted to everyone that I wanted to be alone. That I needed time. They’d reluctantly agreed, only when I gave that time a limit. Graduation day.

Axel and Jacob collapsed in the sand in front of me.

“How are you doing, Soph?” Jacob asked, giving me that look that meant he understood what I was going through. And he did, in a sense. He’d had his heart broken. But not because Girl #5 or Olivia had been in love with Uncle Matt or something terrible like that. I guess Scarlett being in love with his best friend was close though.

I shrugged. “I’m okay. I just wish he’d stop calling me. You guys didn’t tell Adonis where I was, did you?”

“No.” Scarlett was quiet for a moment as her hair blew in the salty air. “But he’s asked a dozen times.”

“Thanks for not telling him.”

“He apologized,” she said.

“I don’t really think he can apologize his way out of this,” I said. He’d thought of my mom when he was with me. I had no idea what was real and what wasn’t. I felt sick just thinking about it.

“No, well, yes. He apologized about that profusely. But I meant he apologized to all of us.”