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She turned back to me. “Smooth?” She looked confused by my question and I had no idea why.

“Yeah, smooth. Like pureed thoroughly. Or does it have chunks of tomato in it?”

“It’s homemade.”

“That doesn’t answer my question. Could I just have the sauce on the side? And are there any herbs on top?”

“Some parsley and basil...”

I shuddered and she stopped talking. “No parsley please. I can’t eat it.”

“Oh, are you allergic?”

“No, my palate, like any good palate, just doesn’t like fresh parsley.”

“Um...okay?” She jotted something down.

“And what are the sides?”

“They’re on the next page.”

I turned the page of my menu. “Same question about the green beans.”

“There’s no parsley on those.”

“No, I meant the soggy question. Are they steamed just a little? Or are they soggy? I really can’t stomach soggy food.”

“They’re not soggy.”

“Is there any seasoning on them?”

“Salt. Pepper. Garlic.” She shrugged.

“Can I have them without garlic? And to the side, since it’s listed as a side. I don’t know why they sometimes mush sides into the meal. And can we maybe have some rolls for the table? But not those healthy wheat ones. The real ones. And butter. We don’t like to share the dipping oil. And there’s always parsley in that anyway.”

The waitress just shook her head and jotted down my request. She turned her head to Adonis.

“I’ll have the chicken parm,” he said.

She waited for him to continue.

“Um...that’s it,” he said.

“Great.” She smiled and turned to RJ.

“What the hell was that?” Adonis whispered as RJ literally did the same thing.

“I like what I like.”

“It seems like you don’t like anything.”

“I like you.”

He smiled. “I like you too, Aphrodite.”

I felt my cheeks flush. “Are you running for the hills?”

“Because you enjoy terrorizing the waitstaff?”