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“But what if I’m so bad at it that he doesn’t want to be with me anymore? I was so bad at everything I did with Jacob at first.”

“Scarlett.” She put her hands on my shoulders. “Axel is in love with you. And he’s been in love with you his whole life. A few bad days of sex won’t change that.”

“So it will be bad?!”

“Deep breaths, Scar.”

I followed her instructions.

“You said it yourself. Axel is obsessed with stealing your firsts. He knows you’re not experienced. That’s what he wants. It’s fine.”

“I guess.” But now I was wondering how many other girls’ firsts he’d stolen. Axel saying he wanted to steal all my firsts had seemed so romantic a couple months ago. He’d made me feel special when he was my kiss thief. And it was hard not to think that I was one of many now. That didn’t feel very special at all.

I took another deep breath. It was fine. We’d just do it tonight and I could rip the Band-Aid off and we could move forward. I’d put so much weight on all my firsts. But maybe I was the only one who cared about stuff like that.

“Mr. Halifax is on the move,” Sophie said. “Are you okay if I...”

“Go,” I said. “Just don’t get arrested.”

“If Mr. Halifax puts me in a cage I will literally die of happiness.” She hurried off.

I watched her walk up to him.

He kept staring at the students dancing instead of staring at her as she spoke.

But then she opened her purse.

Mr. Halifax’s eyes bulged out of his head as he stared down at the obscene amount of drugs. He said something to her and she closed her purse. Mr. Halifax looked around the cafeteria, grabbed Sophie’s wrist, and pulled her through the doors into the hall.

Huh. Maybe he would spank her with a ruler. Go, Soph!

“There you are,” Axel said. He held out a glass of punch for me. “Not spiked. As promised.”

I took a sip instead of responding. My eyes fell to his lips. I knew he was experienced. Of course I knew that. But how many girls exactly? Were there just a few notches on his bedpost? Ten maybe? Really 100? I tried to shake the thought away.

Axel had already stolen first, second, and third. And I’d loved every single second of it. Getting to home wasn’t a big deal to him. And maybe it didn’t need to be some big grand thing for me. He’d stolen a lot of the bases right here at school. Why not the last? I just wanted to get past this first so we could start experiencing new firsts together.

I set the punch down and grabbed his hand. “Come with me.” I pulled him out the doors on the other side of the cafeteria. Axel had made each first he’d already stolen very memorable. I wanted this one to be memorable for him. He’d said he didn’t want to steal this next first in a dark closet. So I pulled him into one of my favorite rooms of the school.

“What are we doing in the library?” Axel asked.

“Sh,” I said, like the ornery librarian usually would.

Axel laughed as I pulled him toward the last row of bookshelves. We walked down the row and I stepped forward, pressing his back against the shelf. And then I stood on my tiptoes and kissed him.

His hands slid down my back to my ass, pulling me even closer. He kissed me like he always did. Like he was greedy for more. And tonight I was going to give it to him.

I heard a few books fall to the carpeted floor, but I didn’t care. I just kissed Axel harder. The same way he kissed me.

It didn’t take very long for me to feel him grow hard against me. I thought about all those times he’d woken up hard in my bed. I’d pretended not to notice. But now I knew it was because his body had been pressed against mine. He’d wanted me. He’d always wanted me. And it was okay that he’d already had this next first a long time ago. I’d get the rest of them.

I pulled back and put my hand on the front of his black t-shirt. It was dark in here, but there was moonlight shining in through the windows. It was enough light to make sure I saw the expression on his face. I kept running my fingers down his abs and stopped at the button on his jeans.

His Adam’s apple rose and then fell.

Yes, Axel was more experienced than me. But I still had some experience now. I knew exactly how to warm him up before we had sex. I unbuttoned his jeans, pulled down his zipper and dropped to my knees. I pulled his jeans and boxers down.

“Scarlett, are you sure...”