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“That’s ’90s grunge.”
“Nope.” She shakes her head, and I continue to scroll.
“This one?” She points at the Rollin’ on 22s playlist.
“It’s ’90s hip-hop.”
Her chuckle rings in my ear. “You have something for the ’90s?”
“Caleb used to listen to a lot of ’90s music.”
For the first time in a long time, there’s no angst or pain associated with the memory. In fact, I find that it feels good to think about him fixing things in the house with the music playing.
My phone dings, and the banner comes down from the top indicating that I’ve received a text from Ansel.
“Ansel? What’s my brother texting you for?”
Emelia turns, as does Nina, toward us.
“What?” My heart rate picks up so fast I feel dizzy.
It’s not a secret to anyone in town that Ansel has been accompanying me on some outings, so I could probably use that as an excuse, but we don’t have anything else planned at the moment. We’re trying to keep our distance until I work through my list.
“Oh, probably wondering when he can get in for a massage. He’s been a few times because he tweaked his back.” I keep my gaze steadily on the phone screen, trying like hell to act nonchalant.
I feel Sutton look at me for a few beats, but I resist the urge to meet her gaze, knowing she’ll see right through me. Sutton lets the topic go, and we settle on a Pajama Party playlist I made ages ago, and the dance party commences.
After a while, curiosity gets the better of me, and I excuse myself to go to the bathroom. As soon as I’m locked inside, I pull my phone from my back pocket and check Ansel’s text.
Ansel
Haven’t talked in a few days. Hope you’re doing okay.
I smile at the screen. Should I be smiling? Maybe part of this trying to find my way back to myself means I’m not supposed to feel any kind of affection at all toward Ansel until I’ve done my checklist.
It’s been a few days since I’ve talked to him, though I’ve wanted to reach out a bunch of times.
Me
Girls’ night at my place tonight. Already checked one thing off my list!
He texts back right away, almost as though he’s been waiting by the phone for me to respond.
Ansel
Look at you go! Star student.
It’s probably the wine, but I want to stay in this bathroom and text him something flirty. Prolong this back and forth between us. But that’s not going to help us get to the endgame. So I slide my phone back into my pocket, unlock the door, and get back to my girls’ night.
If things with Ansel progress, I want to make sure I’m ready for it.
TWENTY-SIX
Ansel
It wasn’t until Collins decided that she needed to step back that I realized how much I enjoyed spending time with her. I’d look forward to our conversations, her laughter, and hearing her stories.
She steps into the waiting area wearing her scrubs, and all I want to do is kiss her.
