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“Go ‘head.”
“You stop interrogating me about Lloyd. If I decide to have dinner with that man, that is my choice. If he kisses me on the forehead, that is my choice. You do not own me.”
“I kno’ I don’t own you.”
“You behave like you do.”
I rubbed my beard. “And what exactly are we if I’m supposed to sit around smilin’ while another nigga pursues you?”
“That’s what I came here to ask you,” she said, looking me in the eyes.
Now we were getting somewhere.
“What are we, Meek?” she asked.
We sat in silence for a little minute. I knew what I wanted to be, but saying it out loud made the shit real.
“I want you,” I said.
“You’ve established that a while ago.”
“Nah, I want you. I don’t want this sneakin’ shit forever. I don’t want you datin’ Lloyd. I don’t want no other nigga touchin’ you. I want to be able to come to yo’ house without takin’ a fuckin’ golf cart and payin’ security to keep their mouths closed. I want to wake up beside you and not have to leave before the sun comes up.”
Kyenna’s expression softened, but she still didn’t rescue me from saying the rest.
“I love you. There I said it.”
“Damn,” she said. “This scares me.”
“I don’t want you scared of me.”
“I’m not scared you're going to kill me or beat me. That’s not what I mean. I’m scared of what this could become. I loved your brother with everything in me, Meek. Now I’m sitting in his brother’s house trying to figure out whether I’m falling in love again.”
“You said falling.” I smiled.
“Don’t ruin the moment,” she said.
I got up and moved around the island. I stopped in front of her but didn’t touch her.
“I’ll back off. Security does not have to report your every move, and I’ll stop bothering you every time Lloyd’s name comes up.”
“That second one sounded painful.”
“Shit, cause it is. You kno’ I don’t like that fuck nigga.”
“I’m not saying I like him more than you.”
“You like that muthafucka?”
“Shameek…”
“I’m askin’.”
“I don’t know yet.”
“And you want me to be cool wit’ you bein’ ‘round him when you got feelins’ growin’?”
“I need to see that you can actually respect what I asked instead of agreeing because you want me to stay. Then the family is another conversation.”
