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“Jenni?” Roxy pulls on the hem of my shirt. “Jenni, is Goobie okay?”

Another sob from the street brings my eyes back to Ryder who’s now coming towards us. “I’m so sorry,” Ryder rushes past me. I try to reach out, I try to grab him because I know he’s devastated, but I miss his arm. I hear the front door of the house slam–making me jump. The force is proof of the anger he’s feeling.

Dropping my arms, my body goes numb. “No, baby, he’s not okay.”

“Jenni?”

I look up and see Bubba standing on the sidewalk. My eyes drift from side to side, seeing if he’s alone. I haven’t spent any time with Bubba, and after what went down with Savannah, I’m not comfortable with him being around me.

After I wipe the non-stop tears from my eyes, I give him a tight smile. “Hey, Bubba. Everything all right?”

Rubbing the back of his neck, he drops his hand. “Yeah, I think. I heard what happened the other day. I’m real sorry about your dog. I wanted to see if there was anything you needed.”

Keith ‘Bubba’ Dawson is a good-looking man. He’s big in stature, but not as big girth wise as some of the other guys. His grin, when he shows it, is lopsided, more boy than man. The few times I’ve seen him smile, it lights up his whole face making his grayish blue eyes sparkle. The close to the skin haircut and trimmed goatee make him look fierce. Very much like a biker.

“I’m okay.” He nods, turning to leave. “Hey, Bubba?”

“Yeah?”

“You can come up here, you know. You don’t need to stay on the sidewalk. I could use the company.”

Gracing me with that lopsided grin, he nods again, heading up to take a seat next to me. “Aren’t you cold?” he asks.

“You’d think, huh? I think I’m too numb to notice.” Once I’d got the kids off to school, I never went back inside. I don’t have the desire to do anything. Not school work or housework. I can’t stand being in the house, not when it feels so empty now that Goober isn’t here.

“I had a cat once. When I was younger before my ma took off. She’d follow me around like a dog. My dad would give me a hard time about how a man shouldn’t have a cat as a pet. ‘Men are big dog people’ he’d tell me, but I didn’t give a shit. My parents barely spoke to me, and never spoke to each other, so the only thing I had was my cat.”

“What was her name?”

He bows his head, smiling to himself. “Kitters.”

“Very manly.” I bite my lip, keeping myself from smiling.

“I know right? My ol’ man never let me live that down. But shit, the name fucking fit so I didn’t care.”

“What happened?”

“She was killed. I think I was nine when it happened.” He looks out towards the street. “Yeah, because Ma took off when I was ten so it had to be when I was nine. The night it happened, there was a huge thunderstorm. Normally she’d sleep in my room, but I think that weather scared her so she hid in the garage. She must have crawled into the dryer to hide and my dad didn’t know it. He shut it the next morning and turned it on. He didn’t think anything of it when he heard the bump. He thought it was my wet sneakers.”

Wow…

“How did you find out?”

“My ol’ man came into my room and told me he killed her, but that she was my cat, so I had to clean up the mess.” He leans back with his hands behind his head, probably still very much in the memory.

“I’m so sorry that happened.”

He drops his hands and leans over, elbows on his knees. “Yeah, that’s life, though. You never know when something or someone you love is gonna cease to exist, but when they do, you gotta keep them alive in your heart. I don’t give a shit that she was just a cat. I’ve never had another pet. Nothing will ever compare to how awesome she was.”

“Yeah, Goob was my first dog. My father didn’t allow us to have animals growing up, though I begged for a pet. Since we didn’t live on much land, I knew that a horse or a sheep was out of the question, although those were my first choices.” I laugh. “Anyway, when I turned thirteen, I used my ‘teen years’ as a great reason why I should be allowed a pet. That I was growing up and needed more responsibilities. I couldn’t believe it when he finally relented–”

“Manipulation at its finest, huh?” he jokes as he nudges me with his shoulder.

“Totally, but I didn’t care. I wanted a pet. There was a family a few streets over who had these mini pinchers. They were cute with all their shiny black and brown fur. I was about to make my choice when this tiny, fluffy fur ball came bounding into the living room. I’d never seen a dog so little and fluffy. He came right up, and jumped on my leg, pulling at my shoestrings. His bark was so sweet. I remember looking down at him and him looking up at me with his tongue hanging out of his mouth. I was a goner.”

“Love at first sight?”

I laughed. “Yeah, it was love at first sight. Funny thing was that it ended as quickly as it began. I think he played me.”