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Ugh, I wish Ryann were here. He’s making an important speech tonight, though, and I don’t want to jeopardize his job. It’s important to him.

I just wish I were, too.

She rubs her forehead, exhaling sharply. “Mom and Dad are gonna flip their shit when they find out. They don’t pay all that tuition money for you to get drunk at parties.”

“Party,” I correct, groaning when I sit up to reach for my shoes. “One party. You know, for my birthday?”

Her eyes soften slightly, guilt flickering across her face as she comes around the bed to help me. “You’re right, Iggs, I’m sorry. I just couldn’t believe it when your friends told me that you got into a fight. That’s not like you.”

I didn’t exactly get into a fight but I don’t bother correcting her because what’s the point?

Declan clears his throat, breaking the tension. “If you ask me, those guys deserved whatever your friends did. And with the ID Tina got, I’m sure the cops will find at least one of them.”

Oh yeah, and that had been exhausting—giving statements to the police while the doctor waited for my nose to numb up. What a great birthday this has been.

If this is what twenty-two feels like, I don’t know why Taylor Swift wrote a whole song about it. This frickin blows.

Once the doctor discharges me, Declan and Paige help me to the car. I grimace at my reflection in the window—the bloodstained crop top, the mascara streaks down my cheeks, the swollen, bruised face. I should have stayed home. Should probably stay home every night from now on, just to make sure this never happens again. And this outfit is stupid. I don’t even know why I let KC convince me to wear it.

As they drive away, I rest my head on the seat and pull out my phone to check my messages, swiping away the apologies from my friends to read the texts from Ryann.

Ry:

Declan and your sister just left, claiming a family emergency. Is everything alright?

Shilo, pick up the phone.

I need to hear from you.

There are two missed calls as well, but I clear those away, blinking back tears.

I don’t want to worry him, and I don’t want to ruin his night. But God, I really wish he was here to hold me right now. I feel so stupid, so worthless. I wish I were just…someone else. Someone not me.

Actually. You know what? No.

The thought slams to a halt as KC’s words from earlier echo in my head, making my chest ache.

So, should I stop smiling? Should Tina stop wearing skirts?

The fight wasn’t my fault. I shouldn’t be punished for just existing. I’m not the one with the problem—that asshole was. Everyone who ever made me feel this way in high school was the frickin problem!

The car slows as we pull up to the house, and Paige gets out to help me from the backseat.

“You don’t need to come in with me,” I mumble, ducking my head. “Sorry I ruined your night.”

She huffs, throwing an arm around my shoulders as we climb the porch steps, leaving Declan waiting in the car. “You didn’t ruin anything, Iggy. I’m just glad something worse didn’t happen.”

I guess she’s right. But what did happen still hurts.

Worst. Birthday. Ever.

Thankfully, the house is dark when we step inside, and Paige pulls me toward the stairs.

“I’ll help you wash your face, get you all set before I go—“

“What in God’s name are you wearing?”

We freeze in place, my stomach dropping as my eyes dart toward the dining room. Dad sits at the table with a cup of coffee, his wide gaze taking in the bloodstained crop top and tight pants. My blood runs cold when my sister quickly steps in front of me.