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“You’re not even going to fix it?”

He shook his head.

“Why?”

He smiled at me. “Because you did it.”

“So you’re just going to walk around like this?”

He shrugged. “It’ll grow back.”

“And then?”

“Then you’ll shave it again.”

There had to be a word bigger than love for the way he made me feel.

Unfortunately, there was also a word for what I was. Damaged.

And I was beginning to dread the day he’d see that too and come to hate me for it.

He also has a habit of kissing the same spot on my forehead. Every single time. It feels unbearably intimate.

“Why do you always kiss this spot on my forehead?” I turn, only to find him already looking at me.

We’re halfway through the sixth season of Outlander, and despite the fact that his eyes have spent more time on me than the television, he somehow hasn’t missed a single scene.

“Can I not?” he asks, one brow lifting.

“That doesn’t answer my question, Sergei.” I nudge him with my elbow before settling back against his chest.

I’ve tried sitting away from him, but within two minutes I always find myself tangled in his arms.

Not that I’m complaining.

He is quiet for a long moment. “To quiet your demons,” he says eventually. “And mine.”

My breath catches.

“It calms me. Keeps me here.” His thumb traces lazy circles against my arm. “Keeps me from drifting back into the past.”

“What happened in the past?” I ask softly.

He studies me for a long moment, his gaze strangely unreadable, as if searching for something beneath my skin.

“It doesn’t matter anymore.” He replies with an easy grin, but the unease settling in my chest tells me otherwise.

We’ve fallen into an easy routine. He heads out for his morning run after making me breakfast, comes back, and then disappears into the shower, thorough as ever.

I’ve started waking up around eight now; his habits are clearly rubbing off on me.

Every morning, we sit at the table, him with his aggressively black coffee, me with something that actually tastes human.

He drinks his while watching me eat like I’m a particularly entertaining documentary.

I tried his coffee once.

One sip in and I nearly saw God.