Page 72 of Those That Defy the Realm

The relations with the Carnio pack hadn’t smoothed out, so Ty had finally had to concede to their request to meet in person. He’d left a couple of days ago, the day after Ash had to say goodbye. Hence Rory’s currently somewhat anxious state.

“Shit. He should’ve said. Neither Ty nor I have felt him being particularly distressed. I wish I could ease it for him whilst he’s away, but I guess the magic gets more strained the longer he’s separated from us.”

Returning to my task, it strikes me that we’re talking completely casually, although with concern, about something I did not even realise was still in existence a few months ago. My world has certainly altered quite dramatically since the start of the summer.

Henry has explained the whole pack bond thing, so has Ash—the wolf shifter’s being slightly different—but I’d like to hear Rory’s perspective. “Can you feel him then? Do you know what he’s thinking?”

“No, it’s nothing that deep with the pack bonds. But as the heads, Ty and I can tell if any of our guys are hurting. We can pick up a faint impression of their general well-being. And the magic can twang, a bit like the flicking of an elastic band when you hold it between your fingers, when they get injured or have particularly strong emotions. It’s hard to explain.”

“And you can feel all of them? All the time?”

“Yeah.”

I let out a long breath, absorbing that knowledge. Sometimes sorting out my own head is challenging. My ex’s voice is getting fainter in my mind, but I still catch myself thinking something negative that comes from having someone constantly chipping at your every decision. “That sounds intense.”

Rory lets out a huffed laugh. “It can be. Our control over it is getting better, learning to not shut it out entirely but being able to dim it into background noise, especially now we have more bonded to us.”

“Do you think you’ll add more vampires?” I can’t help my curiosity. And Rory and I seem to be getting back to a space where we tell each other everything. Our conversations feel a lot easier since that evening she spent at mine.

She doesn’t answer right away, finishing dipping her roller in the paint tray again. “I think we will. I’m sure there are vampires out there that will want a pack bond once they realise we have a safe home to offer them. And I hope our current members find happiness as well, and we’ll grow organically that way. Ty’s pack, when he was growing up, was a pretty vast network of vampires across the city.”

“You’ll add your member’s mates?”

“Yeah, or partners if they don’t wish to form that kind of bond.”

“Can you have that? I assumed you and Ty would be the only ones bonded that way.”

“Post war it seems to be that only the leaders are mated. But pre-war? Packs were more like a family tree, they included many mated couples, parents, kids, partners. Hopefully, we can get it back to that.”

“That sounds nice,” I say wistfully, one of my old doubts creeping in. My humanity means I can’t ever be part of their world in that way. As Henry is bonded to my best friend, I had made an assumption that it meant that he wasn’t interested in a mate bond. But what if he does? And what about Ash and Henry? If their relationship continues to grow, which I hope it does as I can’t imagine them not being together, will they want to put a mate bond between them? Henry has mentioned how he can bond to a human, to me, it’s why he won’t drink from either me or Ash, but surely bonding to a human would be pointless. It would only cause him so much more pain when he has to live on after I die.

Suddenly, I’m a swirling vortex of emotions that I can’t quite get a handle on. Jealousy and guilt, longing and sadness, they all form a tangled ball in my head. I want forever with my males, but could I handle them making a supernatural bond that secures their eternity when all I can have with them are promises that are so easily broken?

“Hey,” Rory calls over from where she’s perched. She’s stopped painting and is looking right at me. “Not all supernaturals put mate bonds in place and spend their lives perfectly happy together.”

“How did you know that’s where my head was?”

“Because it’s exactly where my own thoughts would go.”

“And how would you feel?”

“Mate bond or not, I wouldn’t want to be with anyone else other than Ty. And we probably wouldn’t have put it in place quite so soon if it didn’t give us the protect—” she cuts off, a smile etching her lips. “Sorry, the growl Ty just gave drowned out my thoughts.”

I knew they could talk mind to mind, but it was the first time I’d seen it written across my friend’s face so blatantly. She doesn’t continue for a second, no doubt responding to her mate through their shared connection.

“My point is that Henry and Ash wouldn’t unbalance your relationship like that. Neither of them need a mate bond to be happy, to be in a lifelong relationship with you. If you’re at the forever point that is?”

Rory’s words are reassuring, but it is something I wish to talk to both my guys about, and it feels like too important a topic for one of our precious video calls. Shelving my questions and concerns, I decide that I’ll face them at Solstice, when we finally get to all be in the same place again.

“I think we are, forever that is,” I tell her. And the words feel good to say, a warmth explodes in my chest.

A contemplative look passes over Rory’s face before she breaks into a smile. “That makes me so happy to hear. They’re both lucky to have you.”

Habit dictates that I laugh, but I don’t fully dismiss it anymore. She’s right. They are lucky to have me, and I’m incredibly lucky to have them as well.

Even if our definitions of forever are vastly different.

CHAPTER 25