Page 37 of Love in the Time of Wildfires

Although it made her question whether she had experienced this level of heated kiss from Michael. She’d never had someone grasp and pull her to them in a way that felt as if Logan couldn’t stand the separation any longer—kissing her with a hunger that overwhelmed all her senses. Every cell in her body bloomed like flowers on high-speed film. What would other things be like with him?

“River?”

“Huh?” She broke from her daydream stupor. River shared a table with Jefferson and Melissa, a Black woman with pink hair who was a volunteer supervisor.

“I was just inviting you to a BBQ at my place this weekend. Do you want to come?”

“Oh! Okay, yeah that sounds really fun.” She focused on the chunks of cheese in her lunch Tupperware as to not make it obvious her mind had wandered. “Is there anything I should bring?” She had no idea what this would be. Obviously, cookies were out, but maybe there was something else she could manage.

“Just yourself. Unless you want to bring someone with you?” Melissa replied while sliding a smile to Jefferson, as though it were obvious who this extra guest would be.

“Just me. I do love a party.” River popped a grape in her mouth, attempting to appear casual.

“How’s that firefighter of yours?” Jefferson asked.

“Who?” River feigned ignorance before realizing there wasn’t any point. Jefferson had already met him and possibly saw the hug between them. Also, she may have mentioned him once, or a few times, to coworkers, because hiking with him and looking for an elusive fox was the only thing going on in her life besides recently joining a local book club. She should start looking into attending workshops or picking up a new hobby or something.

With Jefferson’s single raised eyebrow, she added, “Oh, you mean Logan? He’s fine. He’s currently in Washington.”

“Oh,” the older man frowned. “Is it the Bear Gulch fire? I heard that one is a doozy. He’s not on the front lines, is he?”

“Um . . . I think so.” Gosh darn it, why did River have to befriend some guy whom she now had to worry about? While her ex had a stressful job, she didn’t fret about him. Not like this. All she could think about was Logan might get hurt or something worse, and she’d never get to kiss him again.

“Oh, sorry, River. I’m sure he’s fine,” Jefferson said.

River wasn’t sure how her face must have appeared, but she tried to smooth it into a neutral expression. “I’m sure he’s being careful.” She wasn’t sure if she was trying to reassure Jefferson or herself. Was he being careful? Logan didn’t seem like the reckless type. He was the one constantly telling her to be more attentive. But she could also believe he didn’t look out for himself in the same way he did for everyone else.

Later, when she got home, River laid on the couch, staring at her phone. She knew Logan was likely still working. From the bit of research she did, she learned that wildland firefighters frequently put in fourteen-hour shifts. She looked for local Washington news, but all it did was give her more anxiety.

River also couldn’t help thinking about what Logan had said about being married before. The reasoning he gave for their breakup was his job, which she supposed made sense. It appeared unpredictable and to occupy a lot of his life. There didn’t seem to be much room for anything else. How much regular life stuff had he been forced to miss?

While she appreciated he didn’t place any blame on his wife, she did feel for his ex, because constantly worrying about someone must have been difficult. River only had a small taste, and it wasn’t a pleasant experience.

It also didn’t help that Michael had made her feel selfish for valuing her own desires and goals, and not placing his calling above all else. She likely wasn’t selfless enough to be with a trauma surgeon or a wildland firefighter. River was never the type to sit around and wait for people. She’d rather go to a job she loved, attend BBQs and book clubs, and get more hobbies and friends than she knew what to do with. River would always be too independent for the life men wanted her to live.

But, as it turned out, even the most independent lady could still find herself missing someone. On the first day, the only thing she had messaged Logan was, Okay, stay safe, which wasn’t exactly poetry either. He hadn’t responded to this, and she hadn’t expected him to.

Did he think about their kiss as often as she did? Did he look at the picture he’d taken at the lake and think about her? Did he want to kiss her again?

Okay, she was getting off track again and doing too much daydreaming.

Perhaps he wouldn’t mind chatter from home when he did get off from his shift. She wasn’t sure what to text. Everything felt silly and insignificant in the face of a destructive fire. What would she want someone to talk to her about if she were far away from home? This didn’t take much imagination, because she already was, and her sister had been her biggest comfort, messaging her silly stuff all the time.

I think I figured it out. I did see a fox at Lake Aloha, but it transformed itself into a bird because it’s also a trickster.

While River was eating a pasta dinner and watching TV, her phone lit up with a return message from him.

Logan

Congratulations. You discovered the one magical fox.

She laughed, imagining him saying this in his usual droll tone.

Okay...well now I feel like you’re mocking me.

Logan

You’re talking about a shapeshifting fox.