Page 96 of Revenant

I pull myself from her dream, and oddly feel a sense of triumph when her sleeping form is back to relaxed. My thumb instinctively traces along her bottom lip, faint and subtle, then I press it to my own.

Just enough to feel the ghost of her on my skin.

I check the time on the clock on her bedside table, noting I’m dangerously close to running out of time. But I can’t find it in me to leave.

Not yet.

Crossing the foot of the bed, I contemplate my next move, warring with myself over want and need. Against my better judgment, I climb into bed next to her. Alicent’s body finds mine almost instantly, and I lift my arm up just in time for her to settle her head against my chest.

Slowly I lower my arm, holding her close and internally fighting the bloodthirst. I look down, mapping each of her freckles, this softer version of her still strange to me. Usually, she wears a look of disgust around me, but at this moment, her expression is warm and pleasant.

I’m not sure when this changed—me viewing her as something other than my demise. Truly I’m repulsed with myself, for even thinking she’s anything other than what I want her to be.

Yet, the all-encompassing desire to just…be with her is overwhelming. I have no idea why I feel this way, but I’m worried it will eventually lead to my downfall.

30: Alicent

A comforting blend of florals and citrus pulls at me before I’m fully conscious. For a moment, I subconsciously drift toward it, until my mind catches up to my body and I realize the warmth isn’t mine. There’s an arm draped over me, a chest at my back, and the events of only hours ago crash back into memory.

“Rise and shine, love. We have class in twenty.” Koen’s husky morning voice greets my ear, far too at ease, and despite the riot in my chest, I can’t quite stop the heat that curls through me. His arm tightens, pulling me back against him until every ridge of him is pressed to my spine.

With everything going on, I’d almost forgotten about classes. It feels pointless at this point, which begs the question of why the administration hasn’t been breathing down my neck.

The fog clears, and a far more pressing realization dawns on me. I twist in his arms, curiosity pulling at my brows. “Wait…where’s Elias?”

Koen chuckles softly. “Sorry to disappoint you.”

“That’s not what I meant.” Heat crawls up my throat in red streaks, blooming across my cheeks. Up until a few hours ago, I hadn’t imagined myself in a position like this with Koen. “I was just surprised to wake up to you in his bed.” Which, in my opinion, is a perfectly logical thing to be surprised by.

“Yes, well, he had an early morning. And since we have class together now in…eighteen minutes, I figured I’d let you sleep as long as I could.” His lips brush the sensitive spot beneath my ear; the kiss is sweet, nothing like the stern, collected man I’ve come to know.

“I’ve missed so much as it is. And with everything going on…” My words trail off, trying not to let the disappointment shine through. “What’s the point? I’ve already royally screwed up my future.”

The bed shifts, and Koen hovers over me. “The point is this is what you came here to do. Who cares if you’ve missed a few classes, we’ve all taken them loads of times; I promise you won’t fail.” Unshed tears sting my eyes with his promise. He places one last kiss on my forehead before leaving me in the sheets.

When I came here, all I wanted was to get my degree, to make something of myself and make my parents proud. Never in my wildest dreams did I think it would turn into…this. But cheating doesn’t sit right with me either; if I’m going to make something of myself, I’ll earn it on my own merit.

If that means never sleeping again and putting the sexcapades on an indefinite pause, so be it. At least if I never sleep again, I don’t have to endure any of Eryx’s fucked-up memories haunting my dreams.

Rolling out of bed, I make quick work getting myself together. Discarding Elias’s shirt on the ground, I throw my favorite black cashmere sweater over my head, and shove black tights over my legs before shimmying into a pleated maroon skirt.

Koen stands in front of the mirror in the bathroom, lazily looking me over with something I can only describe as a mixture of content and longing. He folds his arms across his chest, casually leaning against the vanity as if my frazzled state is amusing. “There’s no rush,” he comments, which is easy for him to say when he can basically roll out of bed and look as though he stepped out of a Calvin Klein magazine.

“If that were true, we wouldn’t be going at all,” I fire back, pushing him out of the way. He laughs at my struggle, putting his arms up in surrender before making himself scarce. If he’s going to wait until the last minute to wake me up, the least he can do is get out of the way while I’m getting ready.

I stare at the bags under my eyes from lack of sleep, but also the subtle glow of my skin and the plumpness of my lips that can only be the result from such an adventurous night. Pushing the thoughts away, I note there’s only ten minutes until we have to be halfway across campus. I run a brush through my strands, throwing half of it up in a claw clip before pulling the front pieces out to frame my face. A few swipes of blush over my cheeks, mascara on my lashes, and a trusted lip gloss to finish off the simple look.

My phone buzzes against the counter of the vanity, and I glance over without thinking, already reaching for it before I even register the name lighting up on the screen.

Moriah.

I stare at her name. The last time I saw her…I push it down, pressing my hip into the counter to steady myself.

It buzzes again.

Moriah: Hey babes, you up? <3

Moriah: I know it’s early. I just haven’t heard from you since we ran into each other. Are you okay?