Page 130 of Revenant

“Okay.” I hate that she feels the need to be so apologetic. We both kept things from each other, but I remain silent because I know, deep down, she has more information than I do.

“My father is the alpha of the Carrow pack.” She says it like she’s pulling out a splinter, and her eyes are glossy in a way I have never, ever seen them.

“Yeah,” I manage in response. “I figured.” Once I learned Moriah and Tristan were not only Carrows, but wolves, it was easy to put two and two together.

“But there’s a part you don’t know. My father, Tyson, wasn’t always the Alpha.”

My brows pinch together as I tip my head slightly to the side, confused where this could possibly be going.

“His older brother held the seat before him. Until he gave up the pack, gave up the name, the whole lot of it—for a witch that was supposed to be our…prisoner.”

The room tilts sideways and then rights itself. I reach for my mug, eager for something to hold onto. Moriah wets her lips, looking down at the table before continuing. “He was your dad, Alicent.”

“You knew?” My voice comes out accusatory, but I don’t mean it. I don’t blame her. “From the start. You knew who I was?”

Moriah returns her gaze to mine, and a tear falls freely from the outer corner.

“I…did. Yes. I came to Veilcrest with your name in my pocket. I traded it. I gave proof of the Calder bloodline and your last known address in exchange for help getting out from under my father.”

“How long have you—”

“I found your father’s file in the study one night and read every page of it.” Her hand goes to twist her ring again on instinct, but she stops herself. “My whole life, Alicent, your dad was a story they told at the dinner table when my father wanted to remind us of what disloyalty looked like. The entire pack had been hunting your parents since the night he ran.”

“They found us when I was ten.”

She looks down, as if she can’t meet my gaze, whispering as though the truth is harder to say out loud. “I know.”

I have to look out the window to keep myself from crying. “Were you there?”

“No. I was ten too, Alicent. I was at home. But—” She stops abruptly, then restarts. “My family is the reason they died; I’m not going to pretend they weren’t.”

I nod once. It’s the only acknowledgement I can manage.

“You have to understand. My family knew you existed, but they couldn’t find you. You haven’t turned…and you never tapped into your magic. Finding you was like a needle in a haystack, but I knew offering your existence to the vampires was my only way out.”

“So you traded my life for your own?” I know I sound like a bitch, and part of me feels for her, I do, but it’s hard to not feel even slightly betrayed. My life wasn’t great before coming here, but at least I wasn’t in danger.

“You have to understand what it’s like growing up in a pack like ours.” Ours. Her suddenly including me as if I’m not some outsider feels wrong. “The Carrows are powerful. Ruthless. There is no running, no hiding, no leaving unless they let you. So you have to accept your fate. You wear the dress, smile at the right people, and you do not ever let anyone outside the pack see what happens behind closed doors, because they will go to the ends of the earth to get what they want.” Her voice cracks, and a piece of my heart splinters with it.

A tear escapes the hold she so desperately tried to keep on it. Moriah blows out a breath, collecting herself. “The only thing that has ever been able to stand in their way is a vampire. Which is why I felt Veilcrest was my only option. With the guys free and in my debt, I’d finally be able to live my own life.”

“Moriah—”

“Please just let me finish before I lose the nerve.”

I shut my mouth.

“They believed I was attending a different university, one my father approved as suitable for a Carrow. Every couple of weeks, I’d secretly return home and play the part of the dutiful daughter, then come back. That’s the deal I cut to buy your vampires time. I hid in plain sight while they tried to use you to break their curse.”

My heart stills in my chest. Use me.

“And then we all met you.” She laughs, her thumb pressing hard into the corner of her eye. “I realized I wasn’t running the long con anymore. I was just hanging out with my cousin. The only family I have left that wasn’t trying to hand me off to the highest bidder. And it ruined every fucking plan I had to leave.”

“The night they came,” she says, “I didn’t know it was going to be that night. I swear to you on whatever you’ll let me swear on. But I knew it was coming at some point. I had planned to talk to you after our night at the Lounge. I just hadn’t mustered up the courage yet. I thought it would be safe; no one was supposed to be there and I could check in without them actually seeing me. Then, Reed pulled his stunt and my father finally learned of your existence. I couldn’t maintain my appearance anymore.”

With everything going on when the wolves attacked Veilcrest, when Moriah shifted, I didn’t catalog the details of her appearance. But the memory of her standing in the commons, with obsidian fur, looking larger than most, I understand. “You fought them in the woods, so I could escape.”

“I’d do it again.” She says it instantly, no thought at all.