Page 34 of What a Widow Wants

“She did indeed, my lady.”

Fanny bit her lips until she tasted blood, but she refused to make a sound. That would only give the wretched woman and her daughter the greater victory over her.

Matthew continued to smile at them, but peered closer at Fanny’s face. “Are you quite all right, Lady Stephen?”

Breathe. She must remain in control of herself even as she fled this disastrous scene. “I am well, my lord, save for a sudden headache. I believe I shall ask to return to the house ahead of the others. I would not wish to spoil anyone else’s outing.”

“I am sorry to hear this, my lady. May I escort you to the brake? I’ll instruct the driver to return you as quickly as possible.” His gaze held a modicum of concern and perhaps a flicker of triumph.

“There is no need, my lord.” Fanny rose, straightening her deep emerald spencer and smoothing her green muslin gown. Anything to avoid meeting his eyes.

“But I insist.” The hard edge to his voice brought her head up. “If you will excuse us, my lady?” He dipped his head curtly in the direction of Lady Skelton, then grasped Fanny’s elbow. She scarcely had a moment to make a partial curtsy before he propelled her not toward the field where the conveyance stood, but into the stand of trees behind them.

He continued to march her away from the picnic spot, away from eavesdroppers who might hear his devastating words as he told her he was now preparing to marry Lady Sarah. Well, if he wanted a simpering young fool for a wife, it was just as well she had not accepted him earlier this summer. It would have been the disaster she’d been trying to avoid. What did it matter that her heart was breaking?

Suddenly, they burst through the stand of trees into a meadow filled with sunshine and birdsong. He’d dragged her all the way out here just to throw it in her face that he didn’t want her any longer. Well, she’d not give him the pleasure of seeing his words affect her. No, by God. She’d rather die than cry in front of him. Blinking rapidly to keep the tears at bay, she pulled her elbow from his grasp. “Let me go.”

“If you wish it, my lady, I will do so.”

She gasped, whirling around to face him. “What?”

“I have come to tell you, Fanny, if you truly do not wish to marry me, I will cease my pursuit of you.”

In the deadly calm that followed his words, Fanny heard her heart break. “I see. You no longer want me.” Pain exploded in her chest, forcing out the tears she’d been trying so desperately to control. “You wish to marry Lady Sarah instead.”

He jerked her toward him. “You’re a damned fool if you think that.”

Throat choked with tears, she could scarcely understand him, scarcely speak. “What?”

“I have waited over ten years to marry you, Fanny. Do you honestly think I would throw that over in a day for a scatterbrained child?” His harsh tone cut through the fog that had enveloped her brain. “Do you truly think me so faithless?”

Unable to stop them, tears gushed down Fanny’s face. Then he pressed her against his chest and she watered his hunting jacket amid the acrid smell of gunpowder and the comforting scent that was purely him. At last the watering pot ceased to water and she stepped back from him, wiping at her eyes with her gloved hand. “No.”

“No?” He stopped in the midst of passing her his handkerchief, his tone deeply shocked.

“No, I don’t think you faithless. Not anymore.” The watering pot upended again, and she clutched the handkerchief to her streaming face.

With a deep sigh, Matthew gathered her to him again, rocking her gently. “Does this mean that you are prepared to say yes to my proposal?”

Relief stealing through her, Fanny nodded, suddenly overcome with a peace and joy she’d never experienced before.

“I think I will not take a nod nor a handshake on this agreement, my dear.” He pulled her head up to look at him, and she discovered the joy in her heart reflected back to her in his eyes. “I wish to hear the words, please.”

“Yes, Matthew, I will marry you.” Sweet words that had taken too long to come.

He pulled her against him once more and his lips met hers, hungry and possessive in a way they had never been before. Of her own accord, she opened her mouth, moaning loudly to urge him to enter. No further encouragement needed. Grasping her head, he plundered her at will, tasting her mouth as though they’d never kissed before. When he tried to step back she slid her arms around his neck and held on, lifting herself off the ground in an effort to maintain the kiss.

He laughed and she took the moment of distraction to thrust her tongue into his mouth, holding on as she stroked his mouth with fierce, light caresses. His arms came around her, pressing her to his body, the stiffness of his cock a hard presence between them. He managed to disengage their mouths long enough to say in a husky voice, “Either we stop now or I take you here on the ground, Fanny.”

Much as she would love to have him lay her down here and now, it would not do to appear before the rest of the company with grass stains on her gown and her bonnet broken. She backed away. “Little as I wish to, we had best refrain for the moment.”

The hunger in his eyes lingered, but he breathed deeply and walked a little bit away, his hand massaging the back of his neck. He’d have to retie his cravat; everyone would notice how it had been pulled askew. When he turned back to her, he’d gained control of himself and came toward her, hands outstretched. “Name the day, Fanny, although by God if you make it longer than three weeks I won’t be held responsible for anything I do.”

Fanny took his hands, holding them lightly. “I would have us married as soon as possible; however, I feel you must come to London to meet my daughter, Ella.”

“Does she have the final say in the matter?” His tone was light, but contained an edge of concern. “What can I do to win her regard?”

“For heaven’s sake, she’s six years old, Matthew. And no, I have the final say in whether we marry or not.” He smiled at that, though she was serious. “But from the moment we marry, you will be her guardian, her new papa. I want her to love and respect you as I do.”