Page 17 of Freefall

By the time I pull into my driveway, I’ve convinced myself that I made it all up. Her eyes, the freckles, the look of regret on Harper’s face. I connected dots that weren’t even there. Plenty of kids have blue eyes and freckles. Harper’s regret was because she clearly moved on quickly, not because she felt guilty for hiding a pregnancy.

But what if it wasn’t her moving on? What if Daisy was the product of something else? The thought that Harper could have been cheating on me makes my fists clench as I walk up to my front door. I shake them out, attempting to steady myself as I turn the key.

She wouldn’t do that either. At least not the Harper I knew.

But I don’t know her anymore.

My next thought creeps in through the window I left open when I let myself be vulnerable today. The one I usually keep locked up tight.

Maybe I never knew her.

7

HARPER

“What was that guy’s deal?” Daisy asks as I walk back into the living room. I took a few moments to collect myself before coming back in. Having Nate Caldwell show up on my doorstep was not on my agenda for the day. Having him meet Daisy for the first time was even further down on my to-do list. I knew it would happen. I even told myself it was part of why we needed to move back, but I thought I had more time.

“He seemed super grumpy,” she continues. I take my spot on the floor, opening my crumpled fist to see the crayon still there. I’m surprised it didn’t turn back into a clump of wax.

“Nate’s an old friend,” I tell her, which is as much of the truth as I’m willing to get into right now.

“He didn’t seem old,” she says. Her pencil is poised in the middle of the page she’s working on. Faded words and bits of eraser dust sit beneath it. “I mean, older than me but not old like Grandma.”

Dropping the crayon on the table, I sit up on my knees to see her better. “Not old like age. I mean, he’s a friend from a long time ago when I was in college.”

“Oh, like when Auntie Tessa used to watch me? I don’t remember that, but you said she did.”

I give her a little smile. “She did, but that’s not when I met Nate. I was friends with him before you were born when I went to a different college.”

“You went to two colleges?” she exclaims, her eyes wide with excitement. “You must be super smart, Mommy.”

This causes a laugh to bubble up out of me. “I did, but not for the full time. I went to one college for two years and then finished at the one in Colorado after you were born.”

“Oh.” She gives this a little thought before putting her pencil down. “Why did you leave the first one?”

That’s definitely not something I want to get into right now.

“Well, sometimes you start something, and you realize it’s not the right fit for you. It’s okay to change your mind if you feel that way.”

“Like when I decided I didn’t want to do ballet class anymore?”

“Yeah, exactly like that.”

She nods, thankfully content with that answer, and I sit back down to continue working on the pumpkin. Only a few minutes pass before she speaks again. “Why was he here?”

That’s a great question. I would love to know what Nate was doing banging on my door first thing on a Sunday morning. What was he going to say before he noticed Daisy standing there? No, not say. What was he going to do? He didn’t look like he was about to say something. He looked like he was going to kiss me.

No, that can’t be right.

He’s engaged. Nate Caldwell is a lot of things, but he’s not a cheater. Even if he were, why would he want to kiss me, of all people? He hates me.

“Mommy?” Daisy prompts, and I realize I never answered her question.

“Oh, um. Well, he might be a new client, but we’re still working on the details.”

She scrunches her face, the little freckles across the bridge of her nose disappearing with the movement. “What’s a client again?”

“It means I would take pictures for him.”