Page 98 of Hunger & Harmony

Puzzled by his sudden stillness, I can’t even joke.

“I do.” I lean against him. “You okay?”

His head turns, and even if I can’t meet his eyes, my breath is stolen. There’s an intensity beneath his skin, and it’s not bad.

“If you want it . . .”

He doesn’t have time to finish the sentence.

“Ooh, a butterfly?” The woman says as she comes back. My finger is still on it. “Great choice.”

“You should get it,” Niko finally says, giving my shoulders an affectionate squeeze.

I pause for a moment, staring down at the simple design. I’ve never gotten a tattoo before. Will I choose forever on a whim? What if I don’t like this design years from now? Butterflies are pretty, but what if it doesn’t mean anything?

“Yeah.” I nod slowly. “Let’s do it.”

“Awesome,” the woman says, sliding the binder back over. “This is one-of-a-kind, too. Once you get it, we take it out of the flash options.”

Mine. The tattoo is all mine.

“I’ll hold your hand,” Niko says, and I let my smile return.

“Please do.”

He offers it, and I hold onto him without hesitation. His hand feels like home for mine. He’s not going anywhere.

We’re on borrowed time. So, I’ll etch this moment into forever, and turn memory into ink.

23

STARVED

“Uh-huh. Yeah. I’ll try. Thanks, Lo.”

I end the call with a sigh. Never thought I’d hate a day off.

It’s only Tuesday, and the night of Arteria’s return to the stage feels too soon and a million years away at once.

My bedroom feels claustrophobic. I can only watch MeTube or care for my tattoo so many times. It’s just after five, and Lorelai already said there’s nothing I can do during rehearsals. A part of me wonders if Niko instructed her to keep me away. Ryel must be there. Is Niko protecting me? Himself? Our bond hasn’t felt heavy since his birthday.

Is it because we’re doing something right, or because of the butterfly inked over my heart?

Drumming my fingers on the desk, I slide my eyes over to my phone. Not the work one. I gnaw at my inner cheek, only one person coming to mind.

The silence doesn’t give me an answer.

“Fuck it.”

I grab my phone and promptly stand up. This message calls for pacing, and lots of it. The chats are dauntingly inactive in my message app. I push on the only contact I have pinned.

Her last words to me wither my confidence. She knows I’m no longer just an assistant. I’m more involved than I could’ve ever predicted. Not that she reached back out.

Am I being silly? She’s . . . like a sister to me, closer than anyone else my entire life. Until Niko, I was lonely in any room without her, no matter how many people were there.

A car honks in the distance, and I’m sharply reminded of my reality right now. Out there, everyone knows. The moment my life changed was on air for everyone to watch, comment on, and share. Including her.

I’m about to chicken out when I see it. Three dots pop up, the gray bubble revealing she’s here, too.