Page 106 of Chaos At Second Sight

I let everything out, the sobs like harsh punches, tearing at my chest and throat, squeezing my lungs.

His thick arms closed around me, holding me close, lulling me in his impossible strength, as if he could shield me from my own pain.

“It’s so unfair,” I cried into his chest.

He just hugged me tighter, his warmth soaking into me, and for the first time in forever, I felt like I could breathe again. I inhaled the comforting scent of him, mixed with the fresh smell of the outdoors.

I had no idea how long we stayed like that, but eventually, the weeping slowed.

Mom found us, then Lachlan. They came. They left.

We remained under that old oak, his chest soaked with my tears, my snot, and my grief. But he never complained, never moved, just held me as pure desperation shook me to the core, possessing me.

“Do you know what I used to do as a kid?”

I sniffled and dragged a hand over my nose. Logan cleaned it with a corner of his T-shirt. “What?”

“I screamed.”

“You screamed?”

His chin bumped my head with his nod. “I’d go into the woods, raging that I was in so much pain, and scream. Twice I’d even thought about…getting rid of myself.”

“Logan!”

“It’s fine now.” It didn’t look like it was. “This is the first time I told someone, though. It’s…embarrassing.”

I pressed my face into his neck. This beautiful, cheerful guy used to have depressive thoughts? “I’d never judge you. Thanks for telling me but…have you thought about it again?”

“Nah. I’m too self-centered and love myself too much to get rid of myself.” My lips twitched. “And my family…I’d never do that to them.”

“Why were you in pain? Your…mom?”

He nodded once. “And Daniel.”

“Did they⁠—”

“I can’t talk about it.” His fingers brushed my cheek. “Not yet.”

We paused, his hand massaging my back.

“But I learned something.” His eyes reddened, from tears this time. “You can’t keep that much pain inside. I didn’t know what to do with it, so I went into the woods and fucking screamed. Sometimes my throat bled.” His lips thinned as he swallowed the emotion. “So I say…let’s scream.”

“Now?”

“Now. Tomorrow. Anytime.”

He pulled me to my feet and, together, we faced the forest, holding hands, the crescent moon above catching our matching necklaces resting against our sad hearts.

“On three,” he whispered. “We breathe in and let all the heavy shit out.”

One.

Two.

Three.

We inhaled…then screamed.