Page 65 of With You

I should have known you were going to disappoint me in the end.

My words are harsh, but it’s exactly how I feel right now. I don’t care if he never comes back to Paris, would actually prefer it if he didn’t. He has humiliated me, left me out to dry for something that he knows is important to me and my future.

I run back to the dressing room, gathering my things and leaving the theatre without giving anyone an explanation. I can’t face them all and embarrass myself even further. People stare at me as I walk through the campus in my full outfit, but all I care about is getting back to my room before I break down in front of them all.

I’m rushing so fast that I barely notice Evie and Zena in the common room, both calling out to me as I hurry past. I don’t spare a glance in their direction as I keep going to my room, finally reaching it and throwing myself inside right before I burst into tears.

Months of built-up emotions pour out of me—anger at not getting the solo, stress at having to ask River to dance with me, worry that we might not work well together, fear of wanting River but not being able to give myself to him wholly. It’s all too much and I break down.

“Amelie, what’s wrong?”

I can barely see Evie through my blurred vision, but she comes to my side, dropping to the ground with me as I hold on to her. Another pair of arms wraps around us, Zena resting her head against my back as I cry.

I’m not sure how long they hold me for, but neither of them makes a single move to leave my side. Once I’ve exhausted myself and there’s no more tears left to cry, Evie swipes at my cheeks with the sleeve of her cardigan, while Zena rubs a hand across my back.

“What happened, my love?” she says quietly.

“It’s over,” I tell her. “River’s in Madrid.”

“Madrid?” Zena asks, peeking over my shoulder to look at me. “Why is he in Spain?”

“I don’t know. I just found out from Damien.”

Evie pulls her phone out, and I assume she’s going to try and get more information from him.

“He’ll come back for the showcase,” Zena says, but a part of me doesn’t believe her. It’s the part of me that spent so many years hating him, treating him terribly because of my misconceptions, yet still expected him to upend his entire life for me.

But then I think about how he did exactly that: sacrificed his free time for me, dedicated hours to learning a routine that he would have had no business ever performing if it wasn’t for me. I think about the River that holds me while I sleep at night, who takes care of me in a way no one else ever has before. I cling to that idea of him, to the River that knows me better than I know myself, and I silently send a message into the universe, hoping for him to come back.

Chapter 26

River

My leg bounces up and down rapidly underneath the table as the men around me wrap up their conversations. They lean over the table to shake hands, and I shoot up, my chair dragging across the carpeted floor and almost tipping over as I push it back.

I shove past everyone to leave the room, not even stopping as my father calls after me. I’ll talk to him on my own terms, considering he forced me here on his. I should have known better than to trust him when he invited me out for dinner last night. Once his driver arrived, I assumed we were heading into Paris somewhere to eat, but instead I was taken to the airfield, my father waiting on the tarmac to ensure I got on the plane.

I barely had time to realise what was happening before I was being rushed up the stairs, the door closing behind me as the engines roared to life. I stayed silent for the entire flight, not responding to a word my father said, even when the plane landed and we got to the hotel.

When I woke up this morning, I thought it was all a bad dream, that I’d be back in my room at d’Étoiles with Amelie by my side. Instead, I was alone in a different country, with nothing but my phone, because I hadn’t expected to be this far away. The phone is useless too because the battery is dead, and the hotel didn’t have a spare charger, so I couldn’t even text Amelie to tell her what’s going on.

“River,” my father yells down the hallway as I attempt to make my escape, but this office is a labyrinth and I can’t remember which way we entered this morning.

“I need to get back to Paris,” I tell him as I open a door that leads to a storage cupboard instead of the exit. “Who built this place?”

I throw my hands up as I keep moving, trying every door I see as my father gets closer.

“River, just talk to me for a second.” He grabs hold of my upper arm, and I spin out of his grip to face him.

“You had no right to bring me here.” I point my finger toward him, almost hitting him in the chest with it. “I told you I had other plans.”

“I needed you here, today, son,” he says, as if that’s a good enough excuse.

“And Amelie needs me in Paris,” I tell him. “This could ruin her entire future.”

“What about your future?” He steps closer to me. “That’s what all of this is for. Everything I do is for you, River.”

“Don’t give me that,” I scoff. “You think I care about any of this? I only pretend I do because that’s what you want from me.”