Page 95 of Me and Mr. Darcy

See what I mean?

‘So what did you guys argue about?’

‘It’s a long story,’ I sigh wearily.

‘Well, I’m not going anywhere,’ offers Stella kindly.

I hesitate, then before I can stop it, the floodgates open and it all comes pouring out.

‘Well, first I discovered he’d told lies about our driver, Ernie, to Maeve, this sweet Irish lady who I think really liked him, and then yesterday Ernie told me himself that Spike had punched him for going out with his mom . . .’

‘Jesus.’

‘. . . and then last night at the ball we were dancing and his girlfriend called him, and he just ignored me so I ended up smoking a joint . . .’

‘You smoked a joint?’

‘. . . and went horseriding . . .’

‘In a balldress?’

‘. . . but then I must have hit my head and blacked out because the next thing I know I’m waking up naked in bed and Spike’s there . . .’

‘No way!’

‘. . . and he tells me he’s crazy about me . . .’

‘Holy shit.’

‘. . . and then we have this huge argument and he storms off.’

There’s a stunned silence on the other end of the line.

‘Stella?’

‘Fucking hell, Em, I’m supposed to be the one on the 18–30 holiday. Jeez, if I’d known a book tour could be that wild I’d have come with you!’

I smile. ‘I guess it does all sound a bit crazy.’

‘Crazy? It sounds fantastic!’ gushes Stella, enviously. ‘Trust me, Mexico is totally dull in comparison. All that’s happened here is a couple of pathetic wet T-shirt competitions and a few all-night margarita parties. I never thought I’d say it, but believe me, I don’t want to see another margarita again. In fact, to tell the truth, I’m really looking forward to going home . . . Talking of which, have you heard from Freddy? He hasn’t returned any of my texts.’

I think about my conversation with Freddy last night. Him telling me how much being in love sucked. All at once I feel very emotional again.

‘Hey, are you OK?’ asks Stella, suddenly aware of my silence.

‘Not really,’ I reply feebly.

‘Sorry, there’s me prattling away. So. How do you feel about him?’

‘Who? Spike?’

‘Well, you’ve barely mentioned the other guy,’ says Stella pointedly.

I bristle. ‘I still think he’s an asshole. Even more so now,’ I say defiantly. ‘In fact, now I also think he’s a liar and a bully.’

‘So what are you gonna do?’

‘I don’t know. What did you do about Scott?’ I ask, remembering our last conversation.