Page 237 of What We Become

We finish the end and measure. Knox gets the point.

My beautiful teal bowls get no fucking respect.

We settle into a rhythm after that. Roll, drink, talk shit, repeat. The air smells like cut grass and something deep-fried drifting out of the clubhouse, and it might be the best night I’ve had in months.

“Hey, Knox,” I say during a break. “Can I ask you something?”

He looks at me. Which, from Knox, is the equivalent of a written invitation to proceed.

“So you’re the only one of us who’s exclusively into Sage, right? Like, you’ve never looked at any of us and thought . . .” I gesture vaguely at the general male population of our relationship. “You know?”

Knox takes a long sip of his whiskey. The silence stretches. Eli freezes mid-bite of a nacho. Micah very carefully does not look at anyone. Holden pretends to study the scorecard.

“No,” Knox says.

“No, you haven’t thought about it, or no, you don’t want to talk about it?”

“No, I haven’t thought about it.”

“Not even a little? Not even Holden? Because Holden’s got that whole stern-daddy-detective thing going on, and I can personally vouch for his mouth and⁠—”

“Milo.” Holden does dad voice. Different from the daddy voice.

“What? I’m being a good wingman.”

“You’re being a menace.”

I turn back to Knox. “My point is, the offer’s on the table if you ever want to explore. I’ve seen what you’re working with, big guy, and⁠—”

Knox sets his whiskey down.

I stop talking. Briefly. A personal best.

He steps toward me. I step back. He keeps coming until my shoulders meet the clubhouse wall, then plants one enormous hand beside my head.

“We’ve been over this before, Milo. I’m too big for you.”

I tip my head back to look at him. “Yes. But that was before my bi-awakening, and I think it’s hurtful that you don’t believe in my capacity for personal growth.”

Eli puts his nacho down.

Knox leans closer. “If I put my dick in your ass, I’d stretch you so wide you’d shit every time you fart.”

There’s a silence while I consider my future.

“On second thought, stay hetero, my friend.”

“Good plan.”

He steps back.

Micah turns away, shoulders shaking. Eli has abandoned all attempts at dignity. Even Holden is laughing, the disloyal fuck.

“I’ve made an informed decision about my health,” I tell them. “I’d appreciate some respect.”

Micah snorts. “You’d have to take out a lifetime subscription to hemorrhoid cream.”

I frown, scratching my nose. “Is that a thing? Is there a geriatric subscription box I don’t know about?”