Page 24 of You Fall First

“She’s got your number. She promised to get in touch with you as soon as it’s over.”

“I won’t sleep until I know you’re good,” I say, teeth clenched again.

“I’m aware.” There’s a beat of silence, both of us probably letting our minds go where they shouldn’t. “I feel better knowing you’ve got Dutton. No matter what happens, he has you.”

“Stop.” The word is a plea, and tears sting my eyes, but I will them back in. The universe can’t take my sister away. We already lost our parents. And Dutton needs his⁠—

“Anyway, I gotta go,” Paige blurts. “They’re ready to prep me and stuff.” Her voice breaks. “Love you so much, Noah.”

“I love you mo⁠—”

She ends the call.

I wait two full minutes before reentering the house. I’ve got no idea how I appear on the outside, but underneath, I’m a shell of myself. A zombie brother, going through the motions, trusting that I’ve got the strength to be everything Dutton needs.

Sayla and Dex are waiting for me in the entryway, looking like they don’t want to hover, but they can’t help themselves.

“Dutton’s all good, man,” Dex says before I ask. His jaw is set, brow furrowed, like he knows something’s up, but he’s not pushing for details. I appreciate that about my friend.

Sayla reaches for my elbow. “Kendal and Tim took the kids to the backyard. Dutton seemed very excited about his double scoop. Strawberry and chocolate.”

Meanwhile, Landry and Brock move quietly between the dining room and kitchen, clearing the table. Maggie and Lewis are at the sink doing dishes.

My eyes scan for Jo.

She knows Dutton best in this group, and I’d like her around for moral support, but she’s the only one not around.

“Paige has appendicitis,” I say at last. “They were about to take her into surgery.”

Now the words are out. The story is real. I wait for either Sayla or Dex to jump in and tell me an appendectomy is no big deal. That in the grand scheme of surgeries, it’s probably the best one to get. Instead, Sayla says, “That’s a lot, Noah.”

“She’s in good hands, though,” I rush to say, reassuring myself as much as anyone.

And that doesn’t always matter, I think.

Dex cocks his head. “How are you doing, man?”

“I wish I could take her place on the operating table.” My chest goes tourniquet-tight. “Instead, I’ve gotta tell Dutton his mom’s not coming tomorrow.”

A soft voice behind us says, “Wait. What? Where is Paige?”

We all turn, and Jo’s standing at the top of the stairs. My throat cinches at the sight of her. I can’t speak. I just stare.

“In the hospital,” Dex says.

“Appendectomy,” Sayla adds.

Jo jogs down the steps. From behind her back, she produces a long-eared rabbit.

“Is that Bugs?” Dex pokes the puffy cottontail. “I haven’t seen him for a while.”

“I was going to give him to Dutton,” Jo says. “Because he liked the petting zoo rabbit so much.”

“Aww.” Dex ruffles her head. “That’s sweet of you, Jojo.”

She ducks out from under his palm. “Seems like a weak gesture now.”

“No, I’m sure he’ll love it,” I say over the clog in my esophagus. “Most of his toys are packed up, and I forgot to even ask when the moving van will get here.”