Page 98 of The Heart You Kept

“I’m not going to be a booty call, he either likes me or he doesn’t. It doesn’t matter regardless because I’m not worried either way.”

“Well, that’s ridiculous because we both know you are worried both ways plus another spare way.”

I giggle again. “Right?”

We keep wandering through the exhibition. “What’s going on with Raphael anyway?” I ask.

“Meh.” She curls her lip as if disgusted.

“What happened, I thought you liked him?”

“I don’t know.” She shrugs. “He’s not doing it for me now.”

“This is becoming a pattern.” I frown. “Why do you only like them until you find out that they like you?”

She shrugs. “I guess I’m not interested in someone who has poor judgment.”

I throw my head back and laugh. “Liking you is poor judgment?”

“Absolutely.” She nods as we stop in front of a giant painting of the sea. “I wouldn’t date me. Would you?”

“Probably not.”

“I’m a walking red flag,” she murmurs as she stares at the painting.

“Like someone else we know,” I reply as I stare at the painting too.

“Yeah, but he’s a hot, rich, red flag.”

“Worse. A hot, rich, red carpet.”

She laughs out loud again and I do too.

I love Helene, she always makes everything seem fun.

“I’m just saying,” she continues as we keep wandering, “I think you should give him the benefit of the doubt. Maybe he does like you and sex is his way of introducing some sort of contact between the two of you.”

“No.” I sigh. “I’ve already slept with him, I already know that I really like him. I can’t be his booty call. It will break me.”

“So what do you want from him?”

“Effort.”

“Like how?”

“Like ask me how my day was, go on a dinner date, take me dancing. Call me to say good night. Send me peonies, damn it, he can’t even stand here and talk to me without insinuating dirty talk.” I shrug. “All I know is that I haven’t broken up with a nice guy to be used for sex. I’m at an age where I want more.”

“You want the fairy tale,” she murmurs, unimpressed.

“Yeah, and damn it, I deserve it. I’m a good catch, and if he doesn’t see that then I’m not lowering my standards just to spend one night with him. I’ve no interest in fucking around with bad boys.”

“Fine.” She widens her eyes. “More for me, I guess.” We keep wandering through the exhibition and she glances over to me. “So are you going to think about him all night?”

“Of course I am.”

PHILIPPE

I rub my hands together to try and warm them up, the morning is fresh on the marina. I glance at my watch as I stand with the two others on shift, we’ll be leaving soon.