Page 210 of The Heart You Kept

“Oh my god,” Helene whispers. “What is he doing here?”

“Who?” I frown.

“Didn’t you see? Edward was sitting in the car up the street, watching you.”

“He was not.”

“He is.” She drags me to the front window. “See?” We peer out the front window and sure enough I see him sitting in his Bentley, elbow on the window, looking forlorn.

My heart begins to beat hard.

“What the hell is he doing?” I whisper. “Is he going to come in or…?”

“Go and find out.” She pushes me toward the door.

Before I can stop myself, I storm out and up the street to the car. I get in the passenger seat and slam the door. His big blue eyes find mine and instantly I’m reminded of what he means to me.

Of how much is at stake here.

“What are you doing?” I ask, I can feel stupid tears are simmering dangerously close to the surface.

“I just um….” He stops himself with a shake of his head.

“Edward.” My eyes search his. “I don’t know what’s going on with you, but I’m going to tell you what’s going on with me.”

His teeth catch his bottom lip as he listens.

“We’re not right for each other,” I whisper.

“I know that.”

“No, stay quiet. You will listen to me this time. I have had two weeks alone to think about this and I need to get it off my chest,” I snap. “We come from different worlds. I love peace and quiet and you love to party. I want to garden and you own a coke club. I’m looking for my forever man and you’re looking for an escape route. But for some stupid crazy reason that I can’t explain—” my eyes well with tears, “—I love you.” I swipe them away. “And maybe that makes me a fool, and the fact that you’re watching me from your car weeks after we were last together…makes me think that maybe you love me too.”

His eyes search mine and he opens his mouth to say something but no words come out.

“Well?” I wait.

Silence.

My heart begins to hurt as it cracks wide open.

“I tell you that I love you and you can’t even say one word?” I whisper through tears.

“Doe….” He gives a subtle shake of his head. “I’m…I just…it’s not….”

I wait but he falls silent once more and it’s obvious that he has nothing to say.

My tears break the dam and I angrily swipe them away. “Don’t apologize for not loving me. It’s not your fault.” I get out of the car and lean back in. “Can you just do me one last favor?”

He nods.

“Please stay the hell away from me.” The tears roll down my face. “I never want to see you again because it only reminds me of what we nearly had. And what you couldn’t give me. I’m done,” I spit as my heart breaks in two pieces. “I’m so fucking done.” I slam the door and angrily wipe my tears as I storm back to my store. All his guards are watching, judging me for being so pathetic.

I’m such a fool.

I lie in the darkness; my eyes are swollen and my throat is sore. Seeing him today has torn me to shreds, I can’t stop crying. That whole trip I tried to convince myself that I was stronger than this but the truth is, I’m heartbroken.

And not for the time we’ve had together, because I know it’s been limited.