Page 37 of Keeping Collette

She’d never been comfortable staring into the eyes of the man she’d been dating, but with Deal, she could look at him all day long. The gold flecks in his eyes drew her in, tempting her. “Okay,” she murmured.

Hopefully sometime this evening she’d be able to say more than one word to him, because that was all she seemed to be able to manage.

Reluctantly, she pulled out of his embrace, mourning the loss of his warmth, and grabbed some plates and utensils. Soon they both had heaped plates. Collette had no idea if she was going to eat it all, but every dish looked too tempting for her to pass up.

Before she sat, she grabbed her phone and found one of her favorite playlists and set it to play. The soft strums of guitar filled the room from the couple of Bluetooth speakers she had.

They ate in silence, both of them listening to the music as one of the songs talked about being the only son. The lyrics were poignant and always conjured up images of someone standing on the front porch of an old homestead, gun resting against his shoulder, while his other arm was wrapped around the woman he loved as he stared down the group of people wanting to take away his land.

Only this time when she imagined it, she pictured her and Deal on the porch, and him glaring at the people who dared to hurt her.

It was such a silly little fantasy, but it made all the bad things happening in her life disappear and sparks of joy fill her, even though it couldn’t possibly come true..

“I don’t think I could eat another bite,” she said as she put her fork down and pushed the almost empty plate away. Surprisingly, she’d eaten most of what she’d piled on.

“Me either.”

She spied Deal’s empty dish, which had been heaped way higher than hers. “I’m not surprised.”

As if he understood what she was meaning, he chuckled. “I’ll be working it off tomorrow morning at PT.”

She stood and gathered their plates. “Why do you do that every morning? Was it something you did when you were a SEAL?”

Deal got up and followed her to her kitchen, resting his hip against the countertop. “Yep, every day we weren’t deployed. We would do a couple miles along the sand, stopping every now and then to do push-ups, sit ups, and other tortuous shit Fox thought up. Then we’d swim for two miles, and then run back to where our cars were.”

Theoretically, Collette understood that they needed to keep their fitness up, but the level of what they had to go through shocked even her. “And you still do that now?”

“Pretty much. With our contract with the FBI, we still go on missions with them, so we need to make sure we keep our physical fitness up. Not to mention, even with the other security jobs we go on, you never know when we have to chase down some asshole.”

“Right.” Her mind whirled with the thought of Deal and his friends going into dangerous situations and not coming back.

Resolutely, she pushed that thought away. It wouldn’t be a good rabbit hole to fall down, not so close to her losing Courtney.

“Hey,” he said softly, as he brushed his fingers down her cheek. “We’re always careful and have each other’s six.”

Without thinking through her actions, acting purely in the gamut of feelings running through her, she closed the small gap between them and rested her head on his chest, wrapping her arms around him. A sigh left her when he clasped her close.

The words she wanted to say were locked deep inside her, so she hoped Deal understood what she was saying with this hug.

Like before, time drew to a standstill as they stood holding each other in her kitchen. She hadn’t known how much she needed this human connection until right this second.

What would she be doing if she didn’t have Deal when she’d found out about Courtney?

What if the police had been the ones knocking on her door to tell her about her sister?

As much as she believed she could’ve coped with everything—and she probably would’ve found something buried deep within her to handle it all—she was glad she didn’t have to find out. Glad that circumstances had given her the man holding her. “Thank you.”

Deal pulled back, and she loosened her arms so that he didn’t feel like she had no respect his need for space. “For what?”

She went to take a step back, but Deal tightened his hold. “For this. For listening. For everything.”

Deal pressed his lips to her forehead. “We may have gotten off on the wrong foot, but I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t want to be. And I do. I know the circumstances of how we came to know each other isn’t the most conventional of ways, but I’m glad I met you.”

There was a seriousness to his tone, and his gaze hadn’t left hers as he spoke. Everything he said she felt down to her bones. “I’m glad too.”

She went up on her tip toes and pressed her lips against his. The kiss didn’t have the same urgency as their earlier one. This one was a confirmation of what they’d just told each other. To her it was a sign they were taking the next step toward nurturing the seed growing between them.

When they broke apart, they smiled at each other. “Do you want to take some of this food home?” she eventually asked.