Page 104 of Hating the Boss

“You’re my best friend. I would never bail on you,” I said firmly.

She nodded and wiped away at the tears before they fell completely. I pulled her in for a hug, as Jessica and Juliet headed out the door toward the ceremony.

“I need you,” I said. “I’ll always need you.”

“Ditto.” She laughed softly.

She gave me one last squeeze and slipped out the door after Juliet and Jessica.

I took a deep breath, and clutched my bouquet tightly in my hands. I took my time making my way down the hallway to where the large wooden doors that led to the ballroom were closed. I waited for my cue in the music, a subtle shift to the traditional bridal entrance song.

Closing my eyes, I let myself completely be in the moment. I ran my hand over my bump, sending love and warmth to our baby girl who made me feel less alone in that moment. I turned my head to the left and right, imagining my mother planting a kiss on my cheek as my father adjusted his tie and looked ahead nervously. They were there, just as Jessica had said.

I was eager to see Brad. We hadn’t gone this long without seeing each other since my stay in the hospital. I hadn’t seen him since yesterday’s welcome brunch, which made the butterflies already fluttering in my stomach explode into a frenzy of flapping wings.

I heard the violins begin their familiar melody and opened my eyes just as the large, wooden doors began to slowly open. I sucked in a breath as tiny snowflakes fell against my face, and continued to flow from up above. Around me were pine trees strung in fairy lights, filling the room with a woodsy and magical scent. Before me lay a path lined with candles and white roses, leading me up the aisle to an even more beautiful sight.

Brad.

I choked down a sob as I caught his gaze. His eyes drifted over me and he placed his hand on his chest as I took my first step toward him. He looked the most handsome I had ever seen him in a night black tux and a crisp white button-down fixed at the collar with a black bow tie. He gave me a reassuring smile that pulled at the corner of his lips before looking over to his right. I followed his gaze and gasped.

There, up the steps was Jessica standing next to Brittany and Juliet.

Standing.

There was no stopping the tears now. My feet felt like they were glued to the delicate fabric that led me toward all the people I loved. I shook my head, not quite believing what I was seeing.

Jessica grinned at me through her own tears. She looked so beautiful. So proud.

I realized this was her gift to me, and I couldn’t stop the tears that slid down my cheeks thinking about how hard she must have been working to do this. To prove to me that she was strong and that she was going to be okay. To save me from my own perpetual state of worrying about her.

Agreeing to move in with Brad was a bittersweet decision. Of course, I wanted to mesh our lives together, but I had Jessica to think about. I had been taking care of her since our parents passed. I didn’t know anything else, and neither did she, though she had been growing more independent with help of a nurse accompanying her to doctor appointments. Clearly, she had made more progress than I was aware of.

Brad had insisted she move in too, but Jessica politely refused. She was insistent that it was time for her to spread her wings. She wanted her own place, and after spending months searching, we found a place I was comfortable enough to let her gain her independence back. It was made for her with its accommodations placed throughout the apartment.

I felt even more at ease with the decision now that I saw her standing and showing her strength.

Once my feet began to move again and my legs felt steady, I walked up the steps and faced Brad, but not before stealing one more glance at my sister who gave me a confident wink. With my heart swelling in my chest, I took a moment to soak it all in and grin back at her. I mouthed the words ‘I’m proud of you’ and saw her eyes grow glassy. She gave me a small nod, one nobody else might have noticed, but I noticed. One more smile passed between us before I turned back to Brad who was practically beaming as he took my hands in his. He whispered “I love you” to which I whispered it back.

As the minister began the ceremony, I began taking mental snapshots. Behind Brad stood Anton with a cheeseball grin and a tear in his eye. He was Brad’s Brittany, and I had grown to love him and all the pizza he had brought over. In the front row, sat Brad’s parents both with weepy smiles on their faces as they held hands. Just behind them sat Juliet’s husband Chester with their daughter Blair looking quite literally like an angel as she bounced on his knee.

I looked back to Brad, whose gaze was already fixed upon me, his gray eyes soft and filled with love. My eyes remained fixed on his, settling into them like a warm bed in winter, as we recited our promises to each other for forever.

Epilogue

Sarah

My feet still felt swollen as I hobbled down the hallway of the hospital, as if I still had a baby in my stomach and wasn’t now a deflated balloon. I wondered if I would get used to this feeling of my baby no longer being a part of me, and now living and breathing out in the real world. I would think after two nights in the hospital hearing her cries and changing her tiny diapers, that the absence of her kicks wouldn’t be so jarring. The nurses assured me it was normal to feel this emptiness, even though my heart was full.

So very full.

Hearing my daughter’s first cry, shrill and mighty, as if letting the world know she had arrived, was probably the most incredible sound I had or ever would hear. I was immediately brought to tears, which turned into sobs when the nurse placed her in my arms. A little bundle of red, damp skin with large gray eyes that drank me in like she knew exactly who I was.

I knew that most all babies’ eyes started out gray, but I prayed they would stay the cool hue that reminded me so much of her father. The eyes I got lost in, never wanting to find my way out.

Her birth had been a whirlwind, with my water breaking while out to lunch with Brad at our favorite restaurant. We were enjoying steak frites and sparkling cider, thinking that maybe…just maybe this would be our last date just us two. We had been saying that over every breakfast, lunch, and dinner in the last week. This time, we were mulling over baby names for the millionth time. Nothing ever seemed quite right, no matter how many websites we scoured or books we flipped through.

When I stood up to go to the bathroom, something I had grown used to doing a million times a day, I felt a sudden pressure between my legs. Gripping the table unsteadily, I felt a burst and water gush down my legs and onto the floor of the restaurant. Brad looked absolutely terrified, but quickly shook away his wary expression. He mindlessly placed a wad of hundred dollar bills on the table and led me out to the sidewalk where his driver was waiting.