Page 144 of To Tango, with Desire

“I’ve enjoyed watching you grow from a tough young boy into a sharp businessman. And you’ve only yourself to thank. So, well done to you. Your mom would have been very proud. She always told me you were meant for greater things. Ever since you were a baby, she said you were quick. Sharper than most. Agile. You’re a credit to her.

“But I haven’t been honest. And this video is my attempt at atonement. I want to say this first. I loved your mother. Very dearly. But I wasn’t always faithful. Her death left a very big hole in my heart. I don’t know what Kade would have told you, he’s always been bitter about his life, but I never meant any harm to your mom. Had she lived, I’m sure we’d still be together to this day. But I was a man who simply loved women.” He shrugged, a rueful look in his eyes. “I had many needs and it was my right to have those needs met.”

I paused the video, staring at the man I’d looked up to for decades. The man I’d loved as a dad. I looked into his eyes and it struck me that instead of sincerity, I saw pride. There was almost arrogant justification in his apology. It made my blood turn to ice.

“Zane?”

“He’s not apologizing. He’s justifying his actions.” I looked at Amira, shocked by his cavalier attitude.

Had I been that obtuse? Had I never wanted to see his ugly side? Or had he hidden it well?

I pressed play.

“I’ve been this way all my life, so don’t feel like your mom was special in that regard. I’ve done this many times before, and it doesn’t mean anything. It’s just my nature, you see. But, well, Kade blames me for a lot. For his own mother’s unfortunate circumstances. And there’s talk of some letter floating around. Ignore it. That’s just Kade’s way of making trouble. You know what he’s like.

“Because you know how flighty he is, I’m leaving you half of my fortune in the will. I know it’s pocket change to a billionaire, but Kade needs to be taught a lesson. He’s very dramatic, like his mother was, and this will hopefully ground him.” He grinned, but his smile was weak, his gestures stilted.

“So there it is, my boy. I hope this video finds you well. Don’t grieve me too long. I’ve had a good life, and I’m happy with all I’ve achieved.

“There are a few bits I’ve kept for you in my study drawers. Everything will be in a file with your name on it. I’ve the same for Kade. And well, that’s it. Have a good life, Zane. Live it well.”

I sat back against the chair, stunned.

“I can’t believe it. It’s like the man I knew was a figment of my fucking imagination.”

“This doesn’t take away from the good memories you have of him. From the ways he was there to support you.”

“I’m disgusted that he didn’t even have the guts to properly apologize. What if the letter is real?”

“I don’t see why Kade would lie about it. That day he came over and told me the truth, he mentioned the letter. That he still has it. And Zane, after this, I think I believe him.”

The radiating pain in my chest spread down my legs. It felt like my whole body was on fire.

“I need to find that letter.”

“Zane, don’t.”

“Amira, I need to be certain. I can’t live not knowing the full truth.”

“And what will finding that out do?”

I ran my hands through my hair, wanting to yank it out. I was frustrated. Hurt. Betrayed by the one man I’d looked up to. The one man I’d believed in.

Like father like son. It seemed to be a common theme.

“I don’t know. But regardless, I’ll have the full truth.”

And I would finally accept it.

Even if it killed me.

THIRTY-SIX

AMIRA

“Was he there?” I asked as Zane walked into the bedroom.

“No. It’s like what happened yesterday was some kind of fever dream. The house was locked, so I couldn’t let myself in.”