Page 31 of On Your Life

I don’t want to end up in that position again. Last night at the hospital I dreamed I was drowning.

I woke up gasping, convinced my lungs were full of water. My clothes were damp with sweat and my heart pounded so hard that it hurt.

I press my lips together tightly. This had better work. Because I don’t know what I’ll do if it doesn’t.

***

My feet dangle over the edge of the desk. The cool metal penetrates the thin fabric of my jumpsuit, raising goosebumps along my thighs.

Maxie sits on her bunk, painting her toenails without a care in the world. Like we aren’t stuck here for the rest of our lives.

I don’t intend to be.

“How would I go about seeing the night shift guard to talk?” I ask as she zeroes in on her pinky toe.

She’s painting them a dark shade of purple. It reminds me of Halloween. It has always been my favorite holiday.

I worked at the bar on holidays because I made the best money, especially on Halloween. Dressing up was just a bonus.

Last year I wore a slutty nurse costume and made nearly a grand in tips thanks to the ensemble. I should have known I’d start making enemies with my coworkers when they all pouted because they were losing tips.

Maxie blows gently on her toes before inspecting the polish.

“Why would you want to do that?” she asks, shock written all over her face. “If you’re talking about Fox, leave that one alone. He literally set snakes loose in your fucking cell. I wouldn’t go anywhere near him.”

Her eyes travel to my calf. The two tiny puncture wounds ache constantly. Today the pain feels like a giant bruise, which is almost pleasant compared to the burning that started right after it happened.

“I just wanted to apologize to him and try to come to some kind of common ground. Maybe if he sees me as a person instead of a murderer he’ll back off a bit,” I say.

The lie sounds unconvincing as shit the second it leaves my mouth. She gives me a look that says, you’re really going to lie to my face?

“Not likely. Did you miss the part where I said they were best friends? Like he would come in every night and hang out with Knight. They kept us awake with all of their blabbing. It was annoying.”

She rolls her eyes and goes back to painting her toenails. I guess I’ll have to figure this out myself. It can’t be that hard to get him alone somehow.

I just need a reason to get to the guard desk after the cells are locked. The thought settles into my mind and refuses to leave. For the rest of the day my brain works overtime, turning over every plan.

Visitation was extremely easy to set up. All I had to do was ask for a time slot. Hannah called to request a visit today for the time that I picked out. I expected a mountain of paperwork and endless push back but the process was simple.

I glance toward the guard station. Fox is going to get what’s coming to him.

Chapter 17

Fox

Icount each step on the way to B pod. The anticipation is almost too much to bear. A loud beep signals the door unlocking before I walk through.

Everyone begins to line up and my gaze immediately lands on her. She’s leaned over towards her neighbor, whispering in hushed voices about the oh-so-eventful day in prison, I’m sure.

Her face pisses me the fuck off when I walk by for count. Not because of who she is to me but because she doesn’t look afraid.

If anything, she looks happy. Like getting bit by a snake and spending the night in the hospital was some kind of refreshing getaway.

Heat seeps from my pores. The plan was supposed to incite fear. Make her beg me to leave her alone. To make her admit that I’m making her life a living hell. Acknowledging that would make the risk worth it. Instead, she waltzes back in her cell like there isn’t a threat hanging over her head. Like I’m nothing.

Fucking cunt.

***