Page 141 of Trigger Happy Ending

I shove him harder this time, my palms slapping against solid muscle.

“A note, Soren?” My voice raises an octave. “That’s what I got? After everything? After you slaughter a bunch of men, blow our cover, trade your life for mine? You write me a fucking note?”

He comes at me a third time, all alpha male and stubborn. And I expect this, because he is him, and I am me, and maybe we were always going to destroy each other this way. Before I can shove him again, his hands catch my wrists and drag them against his chest, holding them there. My pulse has a fucking riot beneath his palms.

“You can hate me for it,” he says, low and broken. “You can shove me, scream at me, curse me until your voice gives out. Spit on my grave, if that’s what you need.” His grip flexes, his eyes burning into mine. “But I would do it again. Again and again, a thousand more times. If it meant you lived, I’d sacrifice myself every fucking time.”

My eyes sting. God, I want to hit him. Punch him in his mouth, kick him in the throat for making such a fucked-up decision. I want to punish him for loving me like that. I want to fall to my knees and scream.

“But why did you leave?” I hate how meek I sound.

Soren drags a hand over his face. “O threatened me. Said if I didn’t agree to a certain condition that he wouldn’t do the trade.”

My gut drops. “What was the condition?”

His eyes lock on mine. “To never see you again.”

My chest hollows out because I know exactly what that means. O will be watching, lurking, finding a way to ensure Soren doesn’t break the one rule imposed on him.

I let my eyes fall closed. “Why would you agree to something so stupid, Soren?”

“Because I fucking love you, Raine!”

My eyes snap open at the sound of Soren's raised voice.

His chest rises hard. “Yeah. That’s right. I love you. Have for a while now. And I've learned that loving someone means making impossible choices … This was one of those.”

He releases my wrists, and I let them fall to my side. I give up the fight because I realize I’d do the exact same thing for him. I’d lay down my life, all I am, for him.

Soren moves his hands to my shoulders and gently runs his hands down my arms. Before I can bask in the magic of his hands, a wave of dizziness and unquenchable thirst takes over. I do not feel well. I urgently need to hydrate.

“Can I get a water?” I murmur. I don't really fancy dying of thirst in front of him. Kind of kills the reunion vibe.

“Fuck,” he says, face morphing into one of concern. “Of course. Shit, I should’ve thought of that …”

Soren moves to the fridge immediately.

I brace one hand on the kitchen bench and fight the lightheadedness while he twists the cap off a bottle and presses it into my hand. I drink greedily, the cold water hitting my throat. I don’t stop until half the bottle is gone.

I lower it, dragging the back of my hand across my mouth.

“You look like shit,” he says quietly.

I let out a weak laugh. “Romantic.”

A corner of his mouth twitches, but his eyes stay laced with worry.

“I mean it.” He steps closer, taking the bottle from me and setting it on the bench. “You’re pale. You’re shaky. When was the last time you ate?”

I shrug, which immediately proves to be a mistake because pain flares through my ribs. I hiss.

Soren’s jaw tightens. “Fucking hell, Raine. How hurt are you?”

“I’m fine.”

“You’re not fine.”

Before I can snap back, he reaches for me. One arm slides behind my back, the other hooks beneath my knees, and suddenly I’m off the bench.