Page 164 of A Courage of the Chosen

His eyes flit between mine, determination hardening there and within my chest, where we’re infinitely connected now. “We’ll work it out. Together.”

I’m not alone in this anymore, and it somehow makes it less daunting to know I have someone by my side, no matter what.

Callahan wraps a large hand round the back of my neck and pulls me to him, resting his forehead against mine as the tears I was fighting break free. “You have many years ahead of you, Elsie.”

“I hope so,” I breathe in reply.

“Would you like to do anything for your birthday?”

I draw back at his question. I’ve never told him when my birthday is, despite all we shared today. The only reason I know his is February twenty-seventh is because of Rach.

“How do you know that it’s soon?”

Cal’s lips twitch. “Paul told me. He’s having Colin make you a pile of desserts that you stand no chance of finishing. Finneus is rather excited about it all.”

I chuckle, recalling how Grandpa always went extra on my birthdays when I was little. With the thought comes the reminder that it’s been nearly an entire year since I arrived in Elfayne. The day after I turned twenty-five, I awoke in the rooms down the hall, in a place I didn’t know existed, and now I can’t imagine being anywhere else.

“No. It doesn’t seem appropriate to celebrate. Just lots of cake and desserts will suit me,” I say.

“What did you do last year?”

“Your sister made me get dressed up, and got me drunk on gin, prosecco, and cocktails, and we went dancing. Grandpa and I shared cheesecakes, like we always do.”

His eyes crinkle in the corners. “That sounds like her. She always coerced me into celebrating our birthday, too.”

There’s a heavy pause as we talk about Rach, her ongoing condition the elephant in the room we’re all pretending isn’t there.

I bolt upright, a new idea forming. “I’m the answer.”

“To what?” Callahan puzzles, dropping a kiss to my shoulder as he sits up to rest against the headboard.

“Rachel! I have their power in me. Maybe I can work it free with my Dorche magic and keep it.”

He mulls it over. “It’s too dangerous. Last time it almost took you both from me, I’m not prepared to risk either of you like that again.”

“That’s because I used my light.” I scramble out of bed, donning a robe as I pace back and forth. “Think about it. When Tavish used his magic on me, it didn’t turn me the way it has Rachel, because I was born with it already in me. What if I can take back what Raghnall did? Undo it somehow? What if I’m Chosen because I’m the key to reversing it? Tavish used to talk about balance when he had me captive. He needed my light for balance.”

I’m right, I know I am.

Dhia told me there is no defeating the dark. Time and time again, she’s repeated that phrase. What if it’s because both of them have to exist, and the scales have tipped too far? Both light and dark live within me, coexisting. Balanced.

“This is it, Cal.” Frenetic energy builds around me as I run my fingers through my hair, understanding zinging up my spine and stirring awareness in my chest.

“Are you sure? If anything happens to you, or Rachel . . .”

I move to clasp his face in my hands. “I can feel it in my heart, Callahan. It’s making sense. The Druids said return when balance has been restored. Tavish was obsessed with it. Both powers live within me, and I haven’t turned or lost myself since it happened. This can’t be a coincidence.”

His indecision is potent. He’d give anything to save his sister, anything but me. And what I’m saying risks both of us.

He grips my forearms to maintain my hold on him.

“I know it might not work. But we have to try. It’s our last option,” I say finally.

His thumbs skate along the inside of my wrists. “I couldn’t bear it if I lost you.”

“You won’t.”

We both see the half-truth. Neither of us can say what will happen, but what good is me being able to wield both if it’s not to help people?