Page 17 of The Stolen Child

Lily rechecked her son’s position. Ben was perfectly safe. She took a deep breath and answered her mother as calmly as possible: ‘I’m out of his reach, Mum.’

And, even though Lily knew that her mother’s micro-managing came from a place of love, it still hurt. From the moment Ben had arrived in all their lives, her mum had become overly zealous in keeping him safe from perceived dangers. Her mother’s constant reminders to keep him safe more often felt intrusive rather than helpful.

In an over-the-top bright voice, Michael said, ‘Three cheers for the big boy. Hip, hip, hooray . . .’

They all joined in, but there was tension in the room now. Lily smiled weakly, feeling her husband’s worried gaze on her.

‘I’ll go make the tea and cut this up,’ Lily said, walking out to the kitchen, muttering under her breath. Her mother was either absent, or excessively supervising Lily, as if she was a member of her staff. She didn’t know which aggravated her more.

Michael followed her into the kitchen and put the kettle on while Lily sliced the cake into eight pieces and placed them on a prepared tray. As the kettle whistled its way to boiling point, Lily took several calming breaths. She always promised herself she wouldn’t let her mother trigger her, but her mum had a knack of undoing all her resolve with one cutting comment. And Lily didn’t blame her. She understood that it wasn’t only love that made her interfere. It was fear too. Because Lily knew that when her mother looked at her little grandson, she saw her beloved Robert too.

Michael moved closer to her and said, ‘I can’t believe he’s three years old. Our little lockdown baby. It feels like a nano-second ago that I drove you home from the hospital.’

‘That ten-minute journey took nearly an hour; you drove so slowly!’ Lily teased.

‘Precious cargo. I have no regrets. I wasn’t taking any risks getting you home in one piece,’ Michael replied with ease.

Lily blew a kiss to her husband, whispering a thank-you. He always found a way to calm her down and make her feel better. She glanced back towards the living room. ‘Do I have to go back in there?’

‘Nah. I’ll grab Ben, and we can make a run for it,’ Michael joked. ‘I reckon we can make it to the M50 before they notice we’re gone. Try not to worry. It’s going great. They’ll behave.’

Lily wasn’t so sure. Her parents had form. At Ben’s christening, her father had to leave early because they’d got into round nine-hundred-and-ninety-nine of why their marriage had ended. It never came to any fruitful conclusion, because neither wanted to discuss the elephant in the room – the little boy who they couldn’t forget.

Michael placed the teapot on the tray and then moved closer to Lily. ‘How are you doing? Truthfully.’

Lily shrugged. ‘I grew up hating birthdays. All family occasions.’ Feeling her husband’s eyes on hers, she continued, ‘The focus was never on the special occasion. It was on Robert. Mum and Dad would buy another gift and place it in a box for him. Frozen in time for when he came home. But he never came, did he?’

Michael shook his head sympathetically, as Lily bit the inside of her cheek to counteract the rush of emotion she felt.

‘Let’s say that birthdays have always been difficult for our family.’ Lily paused, then looked at her husband, her face softening with gratitude. ‘Until I met you, that is. You persuaded me that all milestone moments deserve cake.’

‘Always cake,’ Michael agreed solemnly.

‘And now that Ben is here it’s even easier.’

‘How so?’

Lily thought back to this morning when the alarm went off and smiled. ‘I woke up today thinking about Ben. Only him.’

‘He’s hard to ignore. I never imagined I could love anyone that small this much,’ Michael replied, using his arms to draw a large round circle.

‘I wish it could be the same for Mum and Dad as it is with us two.’ Lily bit back a sigh. ‘I was never enough for them.’

‘You can’t change your childhood, but they are good with Ben, aren’t they? Your mother dotes on him,’ Michael pointed out.

And Lily knew this was true. It was joyful watching Ben with his grandmother. Lily walked over to the sink and washed the cake frosting from her hands.

‘But it always comes back to Robert. You’ll see. Before the day is over, he’ll be centre stage again. For someone I can’t remember, he sure makes his presence felt,’ Lily said, then she put her face in her hands. ‘God, that makes me sound like such a bitch.’

‘It makes you sound human,’ Michael replied. ‘You love your brother and miss him. But you’ve lived in the shadow of his disappearance your entire life. That’s a lonely spot at times.’

Lily looked at her husband with gratitude that he understood her position. And Michael was right. She should give herself a pass. She did love Robert. It was the mystery of where he was that she hated. She glanced back in the direction of the living room and frowned.

‘Dad is crushed that there have been no leads since his TV interview. He was sure someone would come forward.’

‘In fairness, I can understand why he clings to that. Someone must know what happened to Robert.’

A shiver of unease ran down Lily’s spine. She hated it when family or friends began speculating about what had happened that night, because among that speculation were fingers of doubt, often pointed in her father’s direction.