Page 38 of And It’s Still You

Yeah, that was what I needed to do.

“You good over there, Love?” Shea inquired, putting oil on his beard and locs.

I pushed off the doorframe and walked over to the mirror to check my appearance again. Shea and I ended up matching in nude and white, so we made sure to dress Ocean the same. The dress I wore was long and flowy with a striped pattern, while Shea and Ocean wore similar short sets. Ocean loved when he could match his father. He would try to stick next to him until someone noticed and would be all smiles after. It was the cutest thing.

“Yes, I am.”

“You seemed to be in deep thought over there. Anything you want to talk ’bout?”

My hands swept through my pixie to reshape it to where I wanted before glancing at Shea. I playfully tugged at his chin hair and smiled. “No, I’m good.”

He gave me a look, one that let me know he didn’t believe me but wouldn’t question me on it. Slowly, he nodded, pecked my lips, and stated, “You’ll tell me when you’re ready. Until then, let me tell you how pretty you look. I’m loving this dress on you. I’m loving everything on you.”

The way he licked his lips sent a shiver down my spine.

“Thank you, Shea. You look damn good yourself. That’s why I stood there watching you. You know I’ve always loved seeing you put yourself together.”

“You have. The first time you did, it creeped me out. I thought you were ’bout to jump on my ass or something from how hard you were staring.”

“The way you kept side-eyeing me was hilarious. I figured it was making you uncomfortable, but I kept doing it to see how you’d react. I was admiring you. It just became comical.”

“Shit. It wasn’t to me at first. I knew I hadn’t done anything, but you had my heart racing like I did. In my mind, I was combing through everything to make sure I was good.”

“It’s good to know I put fear in your heart.”

I tried to run away, but Shea snatched me up by the waist and pulled me into him. My head flung back as I released a hearty laugh from the way he was mugging me. His expression softened, and he puckered his lips. Happily, I obliged and placed a wet, sloppy kiss on them. It was a good thing I hadn’t applied my lipstick, or it would’ve been all over our faces.

In between pecks, Shea asked, “You want to know why you put fear in my heart?”

“Oh, so you’re admitting that I do?”

“Yeah, I am because you still do.”

“How so?”

“I feared losing you. With you, life was perfect, Moya. I never wanted to know what it was like living without you. You standing at the door every morning meant more to me than you knew. It was a different form of love, one I couldn’t get enough of. I’m not gon’ front and act like you doing it now didn’t slightly put me in my feelings. To have you again, in the grasp of my fingers . . . Just know I’m not ’bout to let you slip through them again, Love. I’ll go to war with anyone, including you, to make sure I don’t lose you again.” Shea pecked my lips again. “I love you.”

“I love you too, Shea. I always feared losing you too. The deeper you got into JMG, the worse it got. I know God heard my prayers every time you walked out the door because you’re still here, and I’m so grateful for that. You don’t know how many times I’d lie up at night, asking Him to cover you and bring you back to us. Even once we separated, I still prayed over you.”

“For real?”

“Of course. Regardless, you’re still Ocean’s father and someone I loved. I’ve never wished any ill on you, Shea. I’ve always wanted what was best for you.”

“That makes me feel good, for real. I just knew yo’ ass hated me.”

I cackled and palmed the side of his face. “I could never hate you. I strongly disliked you, but it eventually disappeared, and I was able to tolerate you.”

“Hell, I couldn’t tell with yo’ mean ass.”

“Oh, whatever.”

Shea held me tighter as I tried to wiggle from his grasp. I was loudly squealing, and Ocean came running around the corner with his brows dipped. When he realized we were playing, he ran over and started jokingly punching Shea. Shea was shocked Ocean had turned on him, but when it came to me, Ocean was turning on everyone.

We got all our laughs out, finished getting ready, and left after snapping a few quick family pictures. On the way to Angela’s house, I couldn’t stop staring at them. Shea caught me and smirked.

“We look good together, don’t we?” he asked.

“We really do. These are post worthy, but I’ll send them to Elise and my family instead.”