Page 85 of Hard Heart

No kidding.

Well, I’d made it through my exam, and now came the worst part—waiting for the results. Waiting for Levi’s petition to work its way through the legal system. Waiting for forces outside our control to decide his fate and mine as well. Because one thing had become clear—my life was now entwined with his.

And without my studies, I had so much more time to miss him.

“There’s a gas station up ahead,” Raelene said.

“We don’t need gas.”

“No, but we do need coffee. And when I say ‘we,’ I mean me.”

“Late night?”

“Yes.” She leaned back and closed her eyes—I was driving, clearly—and for a moment, I thought she was done. But then she elaborated. “I was reading through an old file. The Tasha Corrigan case.”

“You’re going to take another look at it?”

“All this talk of conspiracies awakened old demons.”

“Sorry. If you need any help with it, just say the word.”

Because I owed Raelene. She’d agreed to help with my impossible case, so the least I could do was help with hers.

“Thanks, I appreciate it.”

I’d seen Levi once since my exam, back at Redding’s Hill. He was basically confined to his cell now. The staff had almost seen their cash cow slip away before their eyes, so now they delivered his meals instead of letting him walk to the chow hall, and he went to the yard alone or with Diesel. That was no way for a man to live.

He’d been tired, the aftermath of the attack taking a toll on his body and his mind. All I’d wanted to do was give him a hug, but I couldn’t. Not when Raelene was sitting beside me and Jim was loitering in the hallway. Instead, I’d drunk coffee and offered the only comforts I could—my words and my presence. Even though he’d smiled and told me things would be okay, my efforts had seemed so inadequate.

I had to get him out of there.

Raelene was right. My feelings towards him were totally unprofessional.

When he found out she wanted to take a look at the crime scene for herself, he’d asked me for a favour. A heartbreaking one. Today would have been Ruby’s birthday, and before we headed to Blackstone House to nose around, I’d agreed to stop at Eastlawn Cemetery to put the miniature rose strapped into the back seat on her grave. One of Diesel’s buddies usually did the honours, but this year, Levi wanted me to pay his respects.

Of course, I’d agreed. I’d nodded because the lump in my throat made it difficult to speak.

If not for her birthday, we might have delayed our trip because Raelene’s car had a flat tyre, and the heater in mine was struggling against the freezing temperatures. Even with extra socks, my feet were cold, and we were both wearing scarves and woolly hats. I bought a coffee too. And a chocolate muffin.

After the year I’d had, I deserved a little treat.

Eastlawn Cemetery was no small, cosy churchyard. Lines of headstones filled a rolling field, a sea of graves with mist lingering between the rows. Jester had given me directions, but he preferred to wait by the car with Raelene. He said ghosts gave him the heebie-jeebies.

Ruby’s final resting place lay near a skeletal oak tree, as far from the entrance as you could get. I passed a handful of other visitors on the trek there, a teary-eyed lady placing flowers on a freshly dug grave, a couple holding hands in front of a small white headstone. I glanced at the dates as I hurried past. A child, only four years old. A tragedy. As I turned into Ruby’s row, a sombre blond man in a wool overcoat nodded to me, and I muttered a stilted “Hello” in return as I hurried between the graves. I’d shrugged off Jester’s comment about ghosts, but now I felt it. The stillness. The chill.

There were no weeds on Ruby’s plot, just a purple pot holding a pink Phalaenopsis orchid sitting beneath the carved inscription on her headstone.

Ruby Rose Costello

Missed every day, remembered with love

The orchid hadn’t been there for long—it was a house plant, and they didn’t do well with frost. Someone else had remembered her birthday? I placed the miniature rose beside it and stepped back. Should I say something? I felt as if I should.

“You’re still loved, Ruby. He hasn’t forgotten you.”

A wave of sorrow crashed over me. Sorrow and guilt. Because Levi and Ruby had been happy once, but now she was gone and I…I was falling for him. Their relationship had been challenging, but mine and Levi’s? It felt almost impossible. Yet still I couldn’t walk away.

Not from him.