Page 19 of The Emma Special

“Yes, I definitely relate to carrying a purse.”

Maggie cooed over the toy, and he adjusted the squishy child against his chest.

Emma lifted her hands in the air. “You’re a natural. Congratulations, you’ve passed your first parenting test.”

“Carry child like a football. Check.”

Maggie reached an open hand toward his face and smeared saliva down his jaw. For some reason, she seemed incredibly happy about marking him with her bodily fluids.

“That is unsanitary, miss.” He lowered his head until he was eye-to-eye with the infant. “Don’t do that again, or I’ll be forced to write you a strongly worded letter.”

Emma leaned against the desk, wearing a smile full of pride. The gripping chill from earlier dissipated, replaced by a soothing warmth.

He’d gone to school with Ginger and Caden, yet they already had the house, the car, and the family. James had the house and the car, but nothing else even blipped on his radar. First comes love, second comes marriage.

He didn’t even have a girlfriend. Hadn’t in years. He was at step zero point zero of the family life plan. Besides, the way his older brother Harrison complained about the ball-and-chain didn’t paint a compelling picture.

Maggie rested her head against his shoulder and sighed.

“I think she’s getting tired.” Emma brushed a hand over Maggie’s white-blonde hair. “You wore me out too. You deserve a rest. Good job, girlfriend.”

James jerked. Had he said the thought about his lack of girlfriend out loud?

Then Maggie lifted her head, turned her big, sweet eyes on him, furrowed her brow, and puked a stream of white fluid all over the front of his shirt.

James didn’t dare move. The vomit pooled on Maggie’s leg where it was hitched around his torso. The warm liquid seeped through his dress shirt and undershirt, sticking them both to his chest. “Is that supposed to happen?”

Emma gawked at the natural disaster, and Maggie slapped her hand against James’s soiled shirt. “Looks like she marked her territory,” Emma said quietly.

“What do I do?” If James so much as twitched, the rest of the vomit would slide down his front.

“Don’t move,” Emma commanded before darting around him and out of the room.

James eyed Maggie who was back to her perfectly chipper self. “I really hope she’s Cinderella today. You know, the princess who cleans and probably has a trick for getting stains out of clothes.”

Emma returned in a flash and swiped at the gooey mess with a wad of paper towels. “That should at least let you break free and save your pants.”

Once the build-up was clear, James lifted Maggie away from him. “It’s all over her too.”

Emma took Maggie and bent to grab a pink and green camouflage backpack, hiking it onto her shoulder. “I’ll change her clothes.” Emma waved a hand at James’s soaked shirt. “You handle that.”

James headed toward his office and the spare outfit in his cabinet he rarely needed, while Emma and Maggie disappeared into the women’s bathroom. With the clean shirt, he slipped into the men’s room and changed. Unfortunately, the smell lingered, even after discarding his undershirt and wiping his bare chest with soap and water.

Sponge bath at the office? Apparently, there was a first time for everything. He smeared hand sanitizer all over himself before pulling on the fresh shirt.

When he opened the bathroom door, he almost collided with Emma and Maggie. The little girl was wearing a new pink onesie dotted with tiny flowers.

“All good?” Emma asked.

“What about the smell? It… lingers.”

“Baking soda helps. Wash it with a half cup of vinegar and line dry in the sun.”

“Can I hang myself in the sun?”

Emma waved a hand in the air. “Rub some dirt on it. You’ll be aight.”

“I smell like a fish that fell out of the creek three days ago. How do people live like this?”