Page 111 of In Between Death and the Devil

Tiptoeing to the door, I unlocked it and slipped inside. My father’s desk was in the far corner, facing a door to the warehouse. The safe was on the wall directly behind it, concealed behind a painting. It wasn’t until I’d removed the painting that I realized I didn’t know the combination.

Frowning, I thought for a moment. I knew my father changed the combination frequently to prevent break-ins, but I didn’t know how he remembered them all. On a whim, I tried my mother’s birthday. Then my brother’s. When I tried mine, the lock mechanism clicked and the door swung open. I wondered if Colt had guessed and gotten lucky like me, or if he’d found out a different way. Shaking my head, I looked inside.

My father’s ring sat on a stack of papers in the middle of the safe. Colt hadn’t gotten to it yet. I let out a shaky breath. Time seemed to warp and still. The urge to reach out and remove the ring so Colt couldn’t was overwhelming.

If I took it, I could prevent everything that happened next. My family wouldn’t die. I wouldn’t go to prison. I wouldn’t need to go to the In Between. Except all of that had already happened. This was a memory, not real life. But if that were true, I shouldn’t have been able to change things. The fact that I could suggested that my actions would make a difference. Otherwise, what was the point of allowing me the chance to intervene?

Hope swelled in my chest. The idea that I could undo what had happened, the worst day of my life, was seductive. Saving my family’s life, even if Colt still managed to frame me for murder, was something I yearned for with every fiber of my being. They didn’t deserve to get caught up in Death’s schemes, to have their lives cut short. It was me she was after, not them. They’d just been collateral damage.

Maybe it would make no difference. Maybe if I took the ring, they would still end up dead, but there was a chance they wouldn’t, and I couldn’t let that chance go. Not after spending time with them again.

Looking over my shoulder, I peered into the darkness. Was I being watched? I didn’t see anyone. Nothing moved. There was no sound aside from my own breath and heartbeat, which pounded in my ears. I turned back to the safe and reached inside.

They’re already gone. I heard Fen’s voice in my head, the same words he’d said to me the night he told me I couldn’t revisit the memory of my family’s death anymore. My hand froze over my father’s ring.

Fen was waiting for me to complete this trial. Fen, who wanted someone to choose him. And here I was choosing something else. Choosing my past. Again.

Even if I could undo things so that my family survived, the realms would still be out of balance. If I didn’t become Death’s Successor, someone needed to. I tried to imagine another person in my place, bonding with Fen, working with Titus, Marcus and Daphne. Even Bea. A sharp revulsion shuddered through me at the thought.

My chin dropped to my chest. If I picked up this ring, I would be letting my past dictate my actions. As much as I wanted my family to live, I couldn’t go back. They were dead. Fen wasn’t. Regardless of what had happened between us, he saw me in a way no one else had. I wanted to work things out so we could be together. Part of me might always be hesitant to trust him or anyone else, but if I wanted to learn I had to start somewhere. To do things differently, I had to walk away from my past.

Trust what has been.

I looked over my shoulder towards the house. It was visible through a window in the back wall. The drawing room was on the second floor in one corner. I could see the shadows of my family moving around through the windows. Swallowing heavily, I withdrew my hand, leaving the ring in place, and closed the door to the safe.

With a sickening lurch, the office dissolved.

* * *

Surrounded by gray, I opened my mouth to take a breath and choked as it filled with water.

CHAPTER 30

Ithrashed, trying to fight my way to the surface so I could cough up the water I inhaled, but I couldn’t tell which way was up or down. Panic closed in around me like a noose as black spots filled my vision. I was going to drown. My movements slowed, my limbs too heavy to move, until something yanked me upwards and out of the water.

Rolled onto my side, my head just above the surface, I coughed and coughed, expelling the water from my lungs.

“Breathe, Maeve,” Fen said, his fear frantic in our bond. “Come on, breathe.”

My hands scrabbled at his arms as I gasped, and the air filling my lungs felt like knives slicing through me.

“That’s it. You’re okay. I’ve got you.” His relief in our connection calmed me enough to gain control of my breathing. He pulled me close, my chin resting on his shoulder. The heat from his body seeped into me and my eyes fluttered closed as exhaustion tried to drag me into oblivion.

“Maeve? I need you to stay awake for me.” He pulled away from me. Cold slipped between us, and I shivered as he cupped my cheek. “Open your eyes. Come on.”

It took me three tries to pry my eyes open and several blinks before his face came into focus.

“Good girl. Can you swim?” His eyes frantically searched my face.

I tried to kick my legs, but my limbs refused to cooperate. I shook my head, my teeth chattering.

“That’s okay. I’ve got you.” He gently rolled me onto my back, hooked an arm around my chest and towed me to shore.

My legs shook, but I managed to stand after a few tries. I wrapped my arms around myself as he gathered my clothes. Then he took me into his arms and shadow-stepped us back to our bedroom.

Steering me towards the fire, he positioned me right in front of it. “I’ll be right back.” Tossing my dress and boots on a chair, he disappeared into the bathing chamber.

I moaned as heat hit my cold skin. It was only pleasurable for a moment before it turned to pain. My fingers were blue and I shivered so much my teeth chattered. I felt hollow, like I’d left a piece of myself in the Pool. Sadness pulled at the edges of where it had been, but it didn’t fill the void. I wondered if anything could.