Page 28 of Snowflakes Over Micklewick Bay

‘Did Polly know you’d seen her?’ Florrie asked, a look of horror on her face.

Hannah shook her head. ‘Blimey, no, I crept away before she spotted me. I dread to think what would’ve happened if she had. I spied her doing it a few times, though, and wearing some of my mum’s jewellery when my mum was at work. When I forgot myself and inadvertently mentioned something to her, she looked angry and told me I was wrong, that it was only similar to my mum’s. She said I shouldn’t go telling tales to my parents and causing trouble, that “nobody likes little girls who tell lies.” She scared me, but I didn’t buy it, though it certainly made me think better of saying anything to them. Something told me she was capable of causing a lot of trouble and I didn’t want to be on the receiving end of it.’

‘How awful that you had to think like that at such a young age.’

‘It gets worse, I’m afraid.’ Hannah took a deep breath. Right, here goes. ‘I gradually became aware of whispered arguments between my parents and every time, Polly’s name was mentioned. My mum seemed to be upset about something and my dad would always be trying to reassure her. All I know is that the atmosphere started to change; there was a sort of tension in the air, and my parents stopped laughing together. My mum looked sad, and her smiles had vanished which really bothered me. And while all of this was going on, Polly seemed to be growing in power, seemed to gain a higher status in our home – at least that’s how my eight-year-old mind saw it. It was weird. And it was the same with Darryl. He just took over, thought it was okay to go into my bedroom and help himself to my toys, thought it was funny to break them. When I complained about it, Polly told me I should be thankful I was such a spoilt girl, that I had so many unlike poor little Darryl, that I should stop being selfish and share them, and that he wouldn’t have broken them on purpose.’

‘Poor little Darryl my backside,’ said Florrie. ‘He’s grown up to be a right slimy rat.’

That made Hannah laugh. ‘Couldn’t have put it better myself.’ Her smile soon fell as she moved on to the part of her story that caused her the most pain. She paused for a moment, as a familiar ache took hold in her heart when she revisited that day.

TWENTY

‘The worst day of my life came when I heard my parents having a blazing row in the kitchen. I’d never heard them argue like that before… so much shouting. My mum was sobbing her heart out. It wasn’t like them at all.’ Hannah felt herself begin to tremble and she clasped her hands together in her lap in a bid to stop them from shaking. It was a scene she’d played on a loop in her mind ever since that day, wishing she could have just stopped her mum, wishing she had the power to change the course of events.

‘You okay, flower? You don’t have to carry on if you’d rather not.’ Florrie’s eyes were brimming with concern, but Hannah was determined to continue. Determined to finally put what had happened into words. She girded herself; she wasn’t going to cry.

‘I ran into the kitchen, begging them to stop arguing, but my dad yelled at me, telling me to go to my room. He’d never shouted at me like that before, so I knew something bad had happened. Anyroad, I ran out of the room and hid on the stairs. Polly’s name was getting thrown about a lot and then I heard the words: “You were kissing her! Don’t lie! I saw you with my own eyes, Jon!”’ Hannah could hear the anguish in her mum’s voice to this day and it still had the power to tear at her heart.

‘You’re okay, lovey,’ Florrie said softly.

‘My dad shouted back that he hadn’t been kissing her’ – Hannah’s voice wobbled, but she pushed on – ‘but that she’d kissed him, that there was a massive difference. But my mum was having none of it. She told him they were over, that she wanted a divorce. She said she was going out and that Polly should have packed her bags and left by the time she returned. She wasn’t to set foot in the grounds of Midsummer Haven again or she’d get the police to escort her off the property. Next thing I knew, my mum had grabbed her keys and her bag and started heading for the door. I’d never seen her so upset. I chased after her, pleading with her to come back but it was like she couldn’t hear me. She got into her car and drove off. I ran down the road, trying to catch her. All I can remember is the rain bouncing off the pavements and seeing the rear lights of her car disappearing down the road. I was soaked to the skin, but I didn’t care.’

By the time Hannah had returned home, Polly was in the kitchen and her father was nowhere to be seen. The young girl hadn’t been able to control the anger that had been rising inside her. She’d yelled at Polly to get out, repeating her mother’s words and telling her that she hated her. Polly had listened, hand on hip, a victorious gleam in her eye that Hannah would never forget.

Hannah ran her hand across her mouth, the pain from all those years ago pushing to the surface. ‘My mum had been gone hours. I’d spent the time looking out of my window, waiting for her, willing her to hurry up and come back. The rain hadn’t let up, the road was like a river, and it was dark. I just remember feeling really scared.’

‘Oh, Hannah, I wish I could give you a great big hug right now.’

Hannah replied with a weak smile; the thought of a cuddle was surprisingly appealing. It was another of the things she missed about her mum and Auntie Coll – their ‘squidgy hugs’, as they’d called them.

She took a breath before she continued, her thoughts going back to what happened next, causing her insides to contort.

She’d peered out of the window, frustrated by the rivulets of rain that hampered her view. A car pulled up on the road outside their house which she’d instantly thought strange; her mum would’ve driven straight into their driveway. She’d watched as two people in dark uniforms climbed out of the vehicle and headed towards Midsummer Haven, crunching over the gravel. Before they’d had a chance to ring the doorbell, Hannah had flown out of her room and raced downstairs, her heart exploding with fear. She’d stood frozen to the spot as her father answered the door, revealing two police officers, one man and one woman, wearing matching grave expressions. They’d each removed their hats as they stepped inside. Hannah’s first thoughts were that her mum had carried out her threat, that they’d come for Polly and Darryl; they were going to take them away. She’d felt a momentary flash of victory – things were going to go back to normal. Her father had led them into the kitchen, his face ashen, telling Hannah to stay where she was. The agonising roar of anguish that came from the room moments later sent horror and confusion searing through her. It was as if there was some wild beast in there with them. Hannah’s little legs had buckled and she’d collapsed to the floor.

‘The police told him that they’d found my mum’s car on the road over by Smitherton. There’d been lots of flooding. It looked as though she’d been driving at speed and aquaplaned across the road where she’d hit a tree head-on.’ Her voice cracked.

A gasp came from Florrie. ‘Oh no!’ She clamped her hand to her mouth.

‘We found out later she’d died instantly which was a huge comfort.’ A sob escaped Hannah’s mouth as a tear spilled from her eye and rolled down her cheek. ‘I’ll never forget my dad’s face when he told me she’d gone. He looked utterly broken. He was never the same after that.’

‘Oh, Hannah!’ Florrie’s voice wavered.

‘Oof, blimey, it’s been years since I’ve talked about any of that.’ She wiped the tears from her eyes with her fingertips. Though she was crying, it felt like a release to finally share it with someone other than her aunt. You were right again, Auntie Coll.

‘Well, thank you for sharing it with me.’ Florrie sniffed and rubbed her hand under her nose. ‘I’m so sorry you had to go through all of that but please know that if you ever feel the need to talk some more, I’m here for you. And I promise I won’t breathe a word of it to anyone.’

Hannah gave her a watery smile. ‘Thank you.’ It came as an enormous relief to know she hadn’t scared Florrie away, that she actually believed her.

‘Like I said, we all knew Polly and Darryl were trouble, but what you’ve just told me is next level. They came up in conversation at the Jolly last Friday after I told the lasses I’d bumped into you – we weren’t gossiping about you, by the way,’ Florrie added quickly, concern flitting across her face.

‘I didn’t for a second think you were,’ Hannah reassured her. She didn’t know Florrie well, but she couldn’t imagine her taking part in mindless gossip, raking over people’s misfortunes for pleasure or adding fuel to local rumours.

‘That’s good. Anyroad, I can assure you that the pair aren’t well liked by the lasses. Stella’s encountered Darryl through her work on quite a few occasions – you remember I mentioned over text she’s a barrister now, has a very successful criminal practice – and she says he’s got a reputation for being dodgy. Between him and his mother they’ve got quite a few backs up in town. Even Lark, who tries to see the good in everyone, can’t find anything positive about them, and that’s saying something.’

‘It is.’ It sounded very much as if Lark Harker hadn’t changed from when Hannah knew her at school – she’d always been kind and gentle, oozing positive vibes. It struck Hannah that Polly and Darryl must’ve done something fairly major to make Lark dislike them, and she was interested to know more.

‘Like I said, we weren’t gossiping, but the lasses did express concern for you and why you had to leave the way you did. Obviously, they don’t know any of what you’ve just told me, but even so, none of them think you were in the wrong.’