Page 25 of Built to Last

“You’re completely missing the point here, aren’t you,” Chase said, fixing me with a flat look.

“The point is that Marco can chase after Kyle all he wants, but Kyle isn’t out, so he’s not likely to—” I stopped, realizing once again that I’d inadvertently outed someone without checking with them first.

As if he knew why I’d stopped, Chase said, “I already knew. Darius told me.”

“Darius told you?” That one stunned me to silence.

“You’re still avoiding the topic at hand here, boss,” Chase went on. “The point I was trying to make is that Marco knows he doesn’t stand a chance with Kyle, as much as he might like a chance, because Kyle is hung up on you.”

I recovered slowly from the shock of knowing that at least one of Kyle’s crew members already knew he was gay. Instinct told me that Kyle didn’t know himself, although I could have been wrong. I just thought that a man who was so concerned that he might ruin everything he’d built over the last few years would be deeply aware of whether his team members knew the truth about him or not.

No sooner had that thought resolved in my mind than I caught the rest of what Chase had said.

Kyle was hung up on me.

“Please stop talking shit in my office,” I said, frowning.

Instead of being intimidated, Chase burst into a grin. “It’s not shit. I’ve noticed myself. Why else would Kyle be in here all the time, getting up in your business and under your skin?”

“Um, because he’s a dick?” I suggested.

“Or maybe because he can’t stay away and he loves getting a rise out of you.”

He’d definitely gotten a rise out of me last night. I hadn’t gone hard that fast or that thoroughly for a guy in ages. Even now, the memory of getting off with him had my jeans going tight and me glad the desk hid everything I didn’t want Chase to see.

“I’m not interested in Kyle Jameson,” I lied fiercely through my teeth.

“Right,” Chase said, rolling his eyes. “And I’m an Olympic gold medal fencer.”

“Touché,” I said, attempting a joke.

I realized too late that that particular joke made it sound like I agreed with him.

Chase grinned like he’d won the argument. He planted his hands on the arms of Sam’s chair and pushed himself to stand. “Anyhow, I need to get out of here. I have a hot date tonight, and I need it to go well, because I’m in the middle of the worst dry spell I’ve had in ages.”

“Definitely TMI to be sharing with your boss,” I said, flopping back in my chair as the tension lifted. I didn’t mind talking about Chase’s sex life until the cows came home, I just didn’t want him insinuating about mine.

And I almost got out of hearing anything more about it from him until he stopped in the doorway and turned back to me.

“Yes, Marco is or has been interested in Kyle,” he said. “But he’s pretty sure he doesn’t stand a chance. Make of that information what you will, but if it was me, I’d be pulling my head out of my ass so fast they’d hear the pop in Dallas and doing whatever I could to get to the bottom of things with Kyle before he moves on to his next construction project at the end of the week. Don’t let yourself be out of sight and out of mind with that one.”

“Very wise for, what are you, twenty-three years old?” I shot after him.

“I’m twenty-seven,” Chase said, reaching the doorway and pausing. “Everyone in my family looks younger than they are.” He rapped on the doorframe. “Don’t let something good pass you by because you think someone else might get there first.”

He waved and disappeared into the café before I could come up with a clever comeback.

Was there a comeback to any of that, though? As much as it rankled me, Chase was right. I knew what I wanted. I’d wanted Kyle all along, since college. I’d been impatient back then and walked away from what I wanted, but it could be argued I was getting a second chance now.

What did I do with that second chance, though? We weren’t kids anymore. We had responsibilities and lives to live. I had to respect Kyle’s choices about how he wanted to present himself to the world. Even if we were the solidest of long-term couples, something like coming out was his decision and his alone to make.

He didn’t have all the information, though. I would have bet anything that he didn’t know Darius knew he was gay. If one member of his crew knew, others might know, too. The big pink elephant in the room might not be as big as he thought it was.

On impulse, I grabbed my phone out of my back pocket, opened up messaging, and quickly typed out, “Are you aware that your crew member, Darius, knows you’re gay?”

I stared at the message as it sat there on my screen, making it feel like my phone weighed a hundred pounds. I couldn’t just up and send it. I couldn’t drop something like that on Kyle without warning. Maybe Darius hadn’t said anything on purpose.

“Fuck,” I whispered, deleting the message.