Page 34 of Axe Marks the Spot

Sir

Good morning, Lindsey. I see your message to me came in late. What happened?

He knows I’m at work and will not always be able to answer right away, just like he clarified he won’t always be able to see and respond to my messages immediately. We both have lives outside of our agreement, and I know he has other clients and his online persona, too. But since I’m on the app, he can see that I’ve read it. Might as well answer now before I take in my next patient.

Me

I had a hard time falling asleep, Sir. When my alarm went off, I didn’t think twice before I hit snooze.

Sir

I see. And why did you have a hard time falling asleep?

Would saying “Because I was thinking about you” be inappropriate? Probably. Especially in the context I was thinking about him. I may have stayed up a bit too late after our meeting scrolling my platonic Dom’s channel and looking at his new wood-chopping videos. He said we had to be honest, but I don’t really want to be honest about that.

Me

I was keyed up after our meeting and went down a Loopr wormhole.

Okay, that was honest. I don’t have to give him the content of said Loopr wormhole, but what I said was true. The little bubbles that indicate he’s typing pop up for a few seconds before his new message appears.

Sir

I’m going to assume that the rest of your planned morning routine fell apart due to your later wake-up, which means you probably forgot to pack food as well?

Dang, he’s good. But I guess that’s why people hire him, why he has a waiting list. It’s a reminder that he’s taken me on due to my friendship with Morgan, that he owes her a favor—another reason I don’t want to fuck up. I want to get this right.

Too bad I already screwed up on the first morning. I know he said failure is going to happen, but that doesn’t mean I want it to happen. I quickly type out my response, keeping it plain and simple.

Me

It does, Sir.

Sir

That’s not what we planned for, is it?

Me

No, Sir. I’m sorry.

Sir

I’m not here to reprimand you or make you feel bad, but I do expect you to take responsibility for your choices. We set up your morning and evening routines for a reason, yes?

Me

Yes, Sir.

Sir

I know you want to please me, Lindsey, and truly, that pleases me in itself. But these routines are for you; they’re in place to set you up for success. When you break the routine, I’m not the one who feels the effects. Tell me, how do you feel this morning?

I feel like an annoyed kid for a moment, honestly. It’s how I imagine Kas feels when I attempt to hold her accountable, even though I’ve sucked at it recently.

I brush that thought away and attempt to answer his question truthfully. I don’t feel like he’s scolding me, but I do feel bad that not only did I not do something right, I disappointed him. I’m also disappointed in myself and feel out of sorts from rushing to get here. Even two hours later, I still haven’t shaken it.

Me