Page 129 of Axe Marks the Spot

1 HOUR AGO

38

Lindsey

THE AFTERNOON SUN BEATS down on me as I sit and enjoy the warm August day. Fox, Morgan, and Nathan are playing cornhole with Kas, and I’m sitting on a folding chair drinking a can of seltzer while I smile down at my phone, replaying the new video DomInTheWoods posted earlier, reading the captions again and again.

My smile grows wider as what he said truly sinks in. When Dane posted videos similar to this one starting about two weeks ago, after our in-person scene together, I thought I was imagining it, making up something that wasn’t there. But now…Now I’m sure I’m not making it up, because his recent Loopr videos have all been inspired by our interactions.

I open the messaging app we use and type out a text to him.

Me

I like your newest video.

Like it’s been for a while now, his response comes through quickly.

Sir

What did you like about it?

I consider what to say. I haven’t asked him point-blank if his recent videos are directed to me, because like I said, I thought maybe I was imagining it at first. But with this last one, I’m positive they are.

We just had a conversation this morning about how my sleep schedule was improving, especially since I’ve stopped covering my coworkers’ shifts on a whim. Dane helped me see that with budgeting and enforcing a spending tracker, I could stop trying to kill myself to make ends meet and only take the occasional extra shift.

Along with that, I’ve been pushing Jeremy on a resolution with child support, and I think the end is in sight. Dane’s been there every step of the way, not doing the work for me but checking in to make sure I follow through and don’t back down on my demands for what Kas and I deserve. It was hard at first, but I forgot how nice it is to have someone constantly in your corner, cheering you on.

And Dane…he’s been that for me.

Me

I liked that I knew you were talking to me, but everyone in the comments felt like you were talking to them.

Sir

What’s your answer, then?

Butterflies fill my stomach at his reply, because it confirms I was right.

Me

I want to see you tonight, too.

Sir

I can’t wait, baby. You’ve been so good; I think you deserve a reward.

The butterflies in my stomach multiply. True to Dane’s insistence on slowing things down and working toward my training collar, we haven’t been physically intimate in person beyond a stolen kiss at yesterday’s obstacle course session. We have, however, continued to flirt and be playful in our messages and when we speak on the phone and over video.

On Monday, he had me wear the remote-controlled toy to work again after he told me to make a list of things I love about my body and I sassed back at him. He never turned it on when I was on the floor, but he edged me on my breaks until I finally gave in at lunch and texted the things I love about myself, and he let me come.

My body buzzes when I think of that moment. Not only because the orgasm was intense, but also because I nearly gave myself away when Billie showed up and sat across from me right after I came. Dane loved it when I told him what had happened, and while it was embarrassing, and Billie asked if I was sick, I loved it, too.

The more I hand over control to Dane, the freer I am. It’s interesting, because had you asked me if that would be the case before I started working with him, I would have thought it a ridiculous notion.

After everything with Jeremy and the way he tried to dictate my work schedule and how I parented Kas, I thought giving up control would make me feel small or trapped. But it hasn’t. I’ve leaned in and embraced my submissive side, the one that’s been there all along. Everything is different with Dane.

Looking back on my time with Jeremy, I think I stayed with him and let him say the things he did to me because I didn’t want to be alone. I liked the idea of having someone, even if being with him meant constantly shrinking to fit into the version of me he was comfortable with. His control wasn’t rooted in care; it was about power, about keeping me dependent.