Page 119 of Axe Marks the Spot

“I had to put so much makeup on. I’d just worked overtime, and I was exhausted. Then Kas was being a pill that day about something. I’m surprised we’re all smiling.”

I look at the picture again, and after hearing Lindsey’s story, I can see she is wearing more makeup than she is now and that Kas’s smile does look a little forced. “Does that happen a lot?”

“Taking family portraits?”

I turn to fully face her, and she flushes. I don’t know if that’s simply her natural reaction to me or if it’s because I’m raising my brow at her. She knows that’s not what I meant. She’s simply being cheeky.

“I know you’ve been exhausted, but has that been combined with Kas being a pill lately?” I ask.

I see her cheek indent as if she’s biting the inside of her mouth, and her gaze drops to her hands, which she now has laced in front of her. I’ve seen her do that before, and I don’t like it.

“Lindsey.”

I say her name sternly, which has the effect I want. She stops biting on her inner cheek and looks at me sheepishly. I step closer to her and take her chin gently in my grasp, my pointer finger stroking her jaw before I tip her face up so our eyes are level.

“Don’t chew on your cheek. I don’t like when you hurt what’s mine.” I grip her chin a little harder. “And please don’t look away from me when I ask you a question, understood?”

She swallows before answering. “Yes, Sir.”

I loosen my grip but keep holding her face, leaning down to kiss her cheek before placing a soft kiss on her lips. I pull back before I give in to my desire to kiss her for longer but keep holding her gaze with mine.

“Now be a good girl, and answer my question.”

“Yes, it happens a lot. More so in the last year with my mom moving away and me having to take extra shifts and do overtime to pay bills. Because of that, I’m home much less and even more exhausted. That leads to me being less of a mom to Kas, which I think is why she’s become so much of a pill. I let her do what she wants, and I know I’ve mentioned that she plays video games too much.”

The guilt in Lindsey’s eyes is evident along with pain and tiredness. I take her hand and rub my thumb over her knuckle. “Do you truly believe that?”

“Which part?”

“That you’re less of a mom to Kas because you’re doing your best to take care of her.”

“Yes, I—” Lindsey stops when my words register in her brain. She exhales a loud breath. “I’d argue that I’m not doing my best. That this is less than my best. Which is why I’m a bad mom.”

She parrots the words like they don’t hurt when she says them, but I know Lindsey well enough now to know that by saying she’s a bad mom, she’s trying to hide how much that thought not only hurts her but also how much she believes it to be true.

“Do you have proof that you’re a bad mom?” I ask.

Lindsey pulls her hand from mine and chuffs. “Do you see this house?”

I don’t look around like she wants me to. Instead, I stay focused on her. “What about it?”

“It’s a mess!” She throws up her hands.

“Are you not allowed to have a messy house sometimes?”

She blinks at me as if I’ve just said something in an alien language. “Says the man whose cabin is perfectly neat and tidy.”

“I don’t have a child, and I live alone.”

“You could still be messy,” she counters.

“I could, but I have many years of practice keeping my home the way I want it, maintaining my routines, and practicing discipline. But I’m not perfect, Lindsey. Nobody is. And to expect yourself to be is out of reality.”

“How are you not perfect?”

My lips twitch in a near smile. “You think I’m perfect?”

She puts her arms over her chest and looks me up and down. “Perfect hair, perfect nose, perfect body, perfect dick, perfect Dom! I could go on.”